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the
dean alhamdulillah alayum peace be with
you thank you for tuning in to the dean
show now we know that half of your Dean
this way of life that the Creator sent
through all the messengers submission to
the Creator not the creation Islam is
half of your faith is marriage then you
get married and you have the little ones
boys and girls but how do you raise them
Islam hasn't even left you alone on that
it's a complete package from A to Z
everything there we have the blueprint
the Quran and Sunnah and we got somebody
qualified enough in the dean show Studio
to give us some great tips on how to
raise some great kids so they can be a
benefit to society when we come back
here on the dean
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showan is
the this is the
show this is the the this is the
de this is
the this is the de
show
thean and welcome back to the dean
show Omar Dr Shaheen how are you she
fine thank you alhamdulillah so just for
our viewing audience to know a little
bit about you you're the president of
the North American imams Federation is
is that right yes can you tell us a
little about this organization North
American imams Federation it's an
organization established in
2003 and it's a concern about imams we
try our best to update imams to make
imams more qualified and to provide
Islamic centers uh in Need for imams
qualified imams we trying our best also
to teach Imam how for example foreign
imams how to speak English uh how to
communicate with uh their
Community uh how to use technology in da
all of these things and you're also the
director of Islamic Studies at the GT
gtf gradical foundation and that's where
that's how we know each other because we
have Dr sabil Imam Musa and myself we're
in your program so uh can you tell us a
little bit about it's my honor that that
you are in in our program and PhD
program actually graduate theological
Foundation it's uh it's not an Islamic
institution but it we have Department
Islamic Studies department and I am the
director of this department and
alhamdulillah we have almost about 200
students in our program we Grant
bachelor degree master and PhD as well
Mah alhamdulillah we're honored to have
you on the program the topic raising
kids a lot of times is easy to have them
but now it's a great responsibility to
upbring them the right way so where do
we start I know it's a short amount of
time that we have so we want to give
some good tips and tricks so people can
raise a good healthy family absolutely
uh first of all uh after praising Allah
subhana wa tala and peace be upon his
servant and last
messenger Prophet Muhammad sallallahu
alaihi wasallam what I want to say that
we as Muslims Community we need now to
read and understand the Hadith of the
Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him uh in
details and in deep understand
understanding because as Muslims we
count in two main resource of Shar Quran
andah and uh Sunnah it is uh it's Allah
subhana wa taala told us
that so we need to believe that every
word he
sayam it there is a purpose for each and
every single word he say it because
otherwise it won't be approved by
Almighty Allah subhana wa ta'ala so we
need to start understand deeply the
Hadith of the Prophet Muhammad
sallallahu alhi wasallam I'll give you
an example many Hadith we read it a man
came to the prophet sallallahu alaihi
wasallam and they start explain the
Hadith after what the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam told him I believe that
no we should understand it and read from
the first word came to the Prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam this is give
us a hint that a man which means he is
not known to the companions otherwise
they will mention his name so we need to
know that this is teach us one important
thing in our life that the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam as a leader
as a qualified leader he his o his door
is open for everyone whether he knows
him or he didn't he doesn't know him and
this is give us the leader qualification
so what I want to say that we need to
understand and read the prophet
sallallahu alaihi wasallam Hadith
different than before we when we talk
about children there is just I will talk
about explain one Hadith narrated by IB
Abbas may Allah be pleased with him and
his father as well and it give us the
methodology of phrasing up and teaching
children in
Islam one Hadith only uh the prophet
Sall Al wasallam once he was riding
donkey andb Abbas may Allah be pleased
with him narrated about this Hadith he
said I was riding a donkey behind the
prophet Muhammad Sall alaihi wasallam
let's stop here and first talk about IB
Abbas when he said I was behind the
prophet sallallahu alaihi wasallam which
mean he was a child little child
otherwise wasse they could not could not
both of them ride a donkey so that means
also told us that the prophet Muhammad
sallallahu alaihi wasallam while he was
walking riding his donkey he greet a
little child so greeting children this
is the first step building and bridges
between you and the children which is
very important in raising up children in
ISL
so we need to communicate with children
we should not ignore children so the
prophet sallu Ali wasallam he was riding
his donkey he noticed that ISB Abbas a
little child standing there he greet him
and asking him how you doing how is
everything then he get the end he knows
that he is was going to somewhere so he
offered him a ride so first point we we
should not ignore our children no matter
how their age so that's the first point
that now we cover that's very important
communication not shutting the lines of
communication shake hold your to telling
us we have to go to break don't lose
your place we got a lot more to cover
and ask you here on the dean show with
Dr shik Omar Shaheen when we come
back do you worship Jesus no you don't
worship Jesus worship the god of Jesus
you are you worship the god of Jesus the
one who Jesus fell on his face and
prayed to yes that's who we worship yes
now do we only believe in Muhammad no we
believe in all the prophets starting
from the first man
created from Adam to Abraham look son
Jacob and the tribe Moses Jesus the the
last prophet was only Muhammad peace be
upon the so we believe in all those
Messengers you mentioned who' you
mention we believe and there's many more
so we believe in all of them all of them
yes all the ones that are mentioned in
the Quran and all of them they all of
them that you know you you don't worship
them but you you worship Allah who's the
creator of but it's part of the belief
to believe in these messages your name
like Jesus you believe in them but you
don't worship them don't worship them
yes back here on the D show and we're
discussing the proper way giving some
tips and tricks to raise some good
children and before we went to break you
were talking about healthy communication
not cutting off the doors of
communication with your children please
continue on yes this is very important
in our life because the minute we close
the communications Avenues between us
and our children that's the end of it
that's the end of it listen and let's uh
emphasize on the prophet Muhammad peace
be upon Him life the children used to
raised whom will shake his hand first
while he is in the street the prophet
Muhammad peace be upon him once he was
walking with his
companion and he noticed that there is a
little child crying in the street he
left he excused himself from His
companion and he went to This Little
Child can you imagine the leader of the
umah Allah's messenger he excused
himself from great Companions and he
went to check the cry why this little
child is crying then he asked him why
you are crying and he told him that he
has a little bird and run away from it's
runs away runs away from him so the
prophet Muhammad peace be listen open
your heart for this advice he told
him oh Father ofay what the little bird
have done to you first of all he Comm
communicate with him he gave attention
to his request and to his complain to
what he wants number two he called him
while he was a little child he built his
personality he show him respect and he
give him the first step of solving his
problem because this little bird run
away from him so he buil his personate
by telling him or calling him oh father
of omay so we need to build our children
personality by calling them good big
names show them respect never ignore
them that's the way we should treat our
children that's the way the prophet
Muhammad peace be upon Him used to treat
children can we imagine that the prophet
sallallahu alhi wasallam while he was
sitting with his companion teaching them
their religion the most important job in
his life in our life a little girl came
to him pulling him from his hand
sallallah alaihi wasallam the companions
they want to discipline here what you
are doing the prophet Muhammad peace be
upon him listen to her and what you want
she pulled him him from his hand out to
the
Masjid can you imagine what she want
guess she lost her toy and she want the
prophet Muhammad peace be upon him to
search for it and he did sallallahu Ali
until he found it saw her smiling face
again he came back to his companion
that's what we do with our children or
we respect them to you maybe what your
child is asking you is a silly thing not
important because his
brother beat him he say bad word about
him to you it's a silly things but to
him it's a very important case in his
life so we need to give more attention
to our children's problems uh complaints
and requests everything and make it a
big deal because
otherwise day after day year after year
if you are ignoring their complaints a
day will come when they could not or
when they are not coming to you for any
problems they have and that time you are
going to lose your children so
communication communication communic
iation respect build their
personality or young man or yeah he used
to call them with big names to show them
that you are something respect we
respect don't give them small little
names because that will affect their
personality day after day and never
ignore their request never ignore their
p uh their personal problems because it
might be silly in the first of their uh
first 2 3 5 10 years but after that they
will when they start having serious
problem they won't come to you if you
ignore them before that's what I want to
advise myself first and every uh teacher
all uh parents to take care of their
children mashallah this is great advice
before we go to break tell us now
addressing their issues how would you in
a real sit situation now that the person
doesn't just have one two three maybe
they have four five six kids and you
know young kids at the age of four five
three two four five six and they're at
each other's throats every time they're
you know fighting each other hitting
each other so how do you deal with them
disciplining them in a healthy way
communicating with them and you know not
driving yourself mad at the same time
absolutely uh yes we might have four or
five children as you said and sometimes
our busy schedule will not allow us to
to do such things with our children but
we as Muslims we need to learn
priority there is priority in our life
absolutely taking care of your sh
children is one of the most important
thing we should do in our life so we
need to learn how to organize our time
how to give time to our children and our
Dean our Islam taught us to respect the
time in everything if you look at the
prayer we pray on specific time our
prayer won't be acceptable if we pray 1
minute before the time is there our
fasting we are not we are going to break
our fast just on time we could not break
it half a minute before we uh sunset for
example so our Dean teaching us how to
respect time so when we organize our
time we will be able to give our
children time we will be able to to give
everything need our time the right time
and we are not going to ignore our
children so organize your time will give
you the time to take care of your
children we have a problem with the time
we need to respect the time more and
give everything and learn priority then
we will will find a big time in our life
for our beloved children beautiful so so
far we got we're going to go to break
but we covered uh empowering your
children giving them good you know
encouragement spending time with them
and what was the other one the other one
organizing organizing time yes okay
we're going to take a break and we'll
right back to wrap it up here on the
dean show why don't you want to pray is
he not worthy of praise and thanks I
mean think about all the blessings that
we have of Allah he created you he's the
one that feeds you he's the one that
takes care of you the ability to see
when unbelievable blessing of Allah and
he loves you start fresh today a new
page a new beginning and reach out to
the one who created you and ask him for
guidance back here on the dean show with
shik Dr Omar Shaheen and we're
discussing giving us some great advice
communication was the first thing that
you talked about and expounding this
all the this wisdom from this Hadith is
there any more wisdom that we can get
from this Hadith absolutely this Hadith
by the way it's teach us the methodology
of raising children in Islam just one
Hadith because the prophet sallallahu Al
wasallam he was very wise and smart and
he put every word for a purpose anyway
let's continue the prophet sallallah
alaihi wasallam
ABB Abbas may Allah be pleased with him
riding behind him the first minute he
get there the prophet sallallahu alhi
wasallam start greeting him and talk to
him or oh young man that's go back take
us back to build their personality
respect show them respect oh young
man I am going to teach you few words
and we need to stop here for a second he
said a few words he did not say
lectures why because he is talking to a
child you need to give him few words so
he can understand so he can have extra
time for fun as a child so the prophet
sallallahu alhi wasallam he noticed that
he's talking to a child and he told
him oh this is my advice to myself to
teachers to parents please don't be
harsh and your children give them the
time to have fun the prophet sallallahu
alaihi wasallam he said in
let's learn from him Sall Ali wasallam
he said few words not lectures not hours
and hours sitting down and teaching him
again and
again beautiful words beautiful advice
from him sallallahu alhi wasallam to
This Little Child may Allah be please
with
him take care of Allah's command Allah
will take care of you
and the prophet sallallah alaihi
wasallam did not stop here he continue
and he said the same meaning with
different words because he acknowledged
that he is talking to a little child or
to a child so what he did sallallahu Ali
wasallam he repeat himself different
words the same meaning so the child if
he missed the first point he will get it
from the second statement and that's
what we need to do with our children
repeat and repeat repeat and repeat if
they did mistake once it doesn't mean
that this is the end of the
life they are subjects to do mistakes
like we as a human beings adult or
children we do mistakes so one mistakes
from your child it doesn't mean this
that this is the end of the life two
mistakes three mistakes we need to be
patient and repeat ourselves once twice
tce as many as they want until they
understand what we want to teach them
then the prophet Muhammad peace be upon
him when he start talking
about take care of Allah's command Allah
will take care of you he start with the
first step or the first level of Islam
which practicing Islam take care of
Allah's command Allah command us to pray
to fast to do this to do that so he
start with the first level of Islam and
we need to acknowledge priority
priorities is very important in our life
you could not teach a a little child uh
something about uh computer while he
could not even understand what you are
what you are saying so we need to
acknowledge their age and teach them
what they can handle what they can
understand priorities is very
important
beautiful the most
beautiful I learned from him sallallahu
Ali wasallam if you ask for help ask
Allah's help the same thing he repeat
himself again with the same meaning
different words because he is talking to
a
child if you ask for help ask Allah's
help only he connect his heart to
Almighty Allah subhah wa ta'ala
this is the second level of Dean Iman
connect your
heart with the action we did in Islam to
Almighty Allah subhanahu wa'ta'ala then
he said sallallahu alaihi
wasallam you need to
know which means you are qualified to
learn and this is again building his
personality never think or give him the
impression that you are a little kid you
don't understand what I'm saying no
Prophet Sall he said you need to learn
so you are qualified to
learn you need to learn may Allah be
pleased with him that if the whole human
beings get together to benefit you while
Allah does the one they want beautiful
he want to confirm the Iman he taught
him in the second statement with the
third level the highest level of Iman
which is make sure that no nothing in
your heart but Allah subhah wa ta'ala
this is how we go gradually step by step
with our children so we need to learn
that communication is very important
thing with our children never ignore
them number two build their personality
show them respect never ignore their
complains no matter how little it is how
silly it it is uh number three we need
to give them time by how we give them
the right time by giv by organizing our
time we are we have a lot of things to
take care of but we need to give our
beloved children the most important of
our time and when we organize our time
after that we need to teach them uh we
need to teach ourself first priority
then teach our children priorities as
well how to do what to do when to do
it's very important in their children
life so we ask Allah subhana T to
benefit us from this is just a hint and
tips how we should understand the Hadith
of the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon
him first second how to deal and treat
children in Islam we ask Allah subhana
tala to grant us the real understanding
of our faith a a mean and before we cut
out we're almost out of time all of this
from one Hadith and this is not coming
from any top psychologist or any top uh
specialist in this area we got all this
from the last and final messenger Pro
Muhammad peace be upon him yes Absolut
one one Hadith only this is this is the
way by the way I teach my children or my
students the Hadith whether they are BD
or Masters or even in 10th or 11th grade
I write the Hadith in the board and I
start asking them what we understand
from the first
word as we said mention in the beginning
a man came what we understand and they
start mashallah we have a very smart
children we very smart students and
sometimes I learn learn from them more
than they learn from me this is amazing
believe it or not thank you I wish we
had more time thank you so much M
theator of the heavens and earth Allah
reward you for being with us thank you
so
much and thank you for tuning in to the
dean show I hope you got the benefit I
surely did and advice benefits the
believer as the Creator tells us in the
Quran and he sent the Quran and the
example the prophet Muhammad peace be
upon him who is the brother to Jesus
Moses abrah and all the preceding
Messengers who came with the same
message worship the Creator not the
creation do good prepare for the day of
judgment and what are you going to leave
behind in this life all the money all
the wealth all those things are going to
stay behind but a righteous child now
will Elevate you in the next life making
do all for you praying to God for you so
make sure that we're raising children to
go ahead and be good servants to the
cater so they can live a good righteous
life and we can benefit from this and we
got to learn about communication
empowering our children and we weren't
getting this from no top psychologists
instead psychologist will tell you the
same thing we're getting this from the
last and final messenger sent to mankind
to Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him so
I'm going to do my best to implement
these things I hope you are too and tune
in every week to the dean show follow us
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help us spread this message so more
people can benefit from this and they
can live the purpose of life they can
have peace in their lives and they can
be successful in this life and have
Paradise in the next we'll see you next
time God willing until then peace be
with you