this is the dean the
de this is
thean this is thean is
thean alhamdulillah alum peace be unto
you thank you for tuning in to another
episode of the dean show this week we
have with us again Dr hatim Who is a PhD
who's a doctor who's a Sheik who's an m
D pediatrician who deals with kids and
we covered a show with him we did a part
one to this we're doing the sequel now
you can go to his section to read a
little bit more about him he's given us
some advice on the million-dollar
question how to make sure your kids
don't go astray they've been given to
you pure in original good goodness not
original sin that child is born in a
state of Purity how do you keep him away
from all the bad things evil things that
are out there it starts at an early age
and these are the questions that we're
going to be picking his brain about when
we come back here on the dean show we'll
be right
[Music]
back this is the dean
[Music]
the this is
the this is the
the is
the this is
the this is the is
the is
the this is
the this is the is
the
the this is
the Salam alikum peace be with
youum thank you very much for finding
the time to be with us here on the dean
show thank you for inviting me I'm
pleased to be here now people can go to
your section they can read about you you
are also I didn't mention the the dean
right of the Sharia Academy yes look you
see the facial expression I just made
because you know what there's a lot of
not yet Muslims a Muslim is one who's
chosen you know Jesus obviously was a
Muslim Moses was a Muslim there's some
people like is this guy crazy Muslim is
obviously one who surrendered his will
to the will of the Creator but there's
some people when they hear Sharia they
say we don't want no Sharia over here so
what is you know they feel like this is
the boogeyman's coming to get them so
before we go on to our topic what does
Sharia
mean sharah is the way to survival the
way to success Sharia is the path that
God had shown us to uh to our prosperity
in this life and the one to come uh Shar
used to mean in Arabic the path to water
bodies and uh in Islam the way that
Allah had shown us is called Shar
because as much as water is uh important
and essential for your physical
well-being the way of God is essential
for your spiritual wellbeing and we're
not only matter we are uh a mixture of
matter and something else which is the
spiritual aspect of humanity that people
uh uh or some people neglect or or wish
uh to uh forget about one more one more
this just brief it's not our topic but
just just so someone's heart can be rest
assured they heard Muslim we Define
Islam and Muslims surrendering to one
God the god of Abraham Moses Jesus peace
be upon all and the last and final
messenger the prophet mhammad peace be
upon them so they can rest assured now
we Define what Sharia is it's not the
boogeyman it's away from the Creator for
success and now what about terrorism
Islam and terrorism what do you got to
say about
this it's all over the news they they
are you say Islam they say Terror they
say you know what all all terrorists not
Muslim but all Muslims seem to be doing
terrorism what do we got to say about
this well it it is absolutely uh not
true I mean if uh you know a simple
study of the history will will show that
this is completely false and uh War has
been started by various people at
various times for various reasons uh
Islam uh the prophet of Islam Prophet
Muhammad sallallah wasallam uh says to
us do not wish to confront your enemies
but if you do be patient so war is not
the default war is to be avoided war may
be necessary at sometimes uh because of
the cause of God which is the cause of
justice and fairness and to deliver the
oppressed from their oppression and and
so on and so forth and if you look at
the earlier Muslims when they engaged in
war it was all about this it was not all
it was never about uh any feelings of
Supremacy ethnic or otherwise because
Islam in you know if if you look at the
history um for instance the the Turks
were not Arabs the Turks are not Arabs
the Turks were not Muslims and uh for
for Europeans particularly they remember
the Turkish conquest and this and that
well the Turks were not Muslim but then
uh when they conquered the Muslim land
the Islam conquered their hearts so they
became uh Muslims
and it was never a matter of you know
ethnic Supremacy the the struggle
against evil is a struggle that begins
from within the first one that you need
to struggle against is
yourself uh but is not limited to that
it is not limited to struggling against
yourself Islam also teaches us that you
want to struggle against evil uh within
and without outside as well so the to
struggle against evil does not mean does
not necessarily mean War does not
necessarily mean uh violence the
struggle against evil is to take all um
uh is to try all other alternative
natives first uh before the surgical
alternative that is to be avoided that
is to be deferred uh that no one wishes
for and the the way of the Prophet peace
be upon Him is is actually a testimony
on on all of those facts and the entire
history test testifies just to this uh
to this very fact add to this that in
Islam uh War uh has ethics that are uh
matchless uh uh before you know the
Geneva Convention and before everything
uh the the the war ethics in Islam uh
the command of the Prophet peace be upon
him to not uh kill a child uh an elderly
person a woman and even the prophet
peace be upon Him adds in in a sound
narration uh to not kill aif means the
non-combatant uh member of the army uh
so that will apply to Physicians and you
know journalists and so on and so forth
so it goes as you know uh as far as this
you know the prophet went as far in
preceding those Geneva conventions to uh
instruct us that not only that we do not
kill women and children elderly but we
do not even kill the non-combatant
members of the army of the of the enemy
uh if they were not
combatant
uh add to this the the the Muslims you
know honor their covenants and they they
don't do treachery and they uh they
don't betray and they always honor their
Covenant so when Muslims are given
security uh somewhere uh they do not um
betray the the Covenant with those who
gave them that security so now people
are getting a different picture this is
not our topic we just wanted the not yet
Muslims to get a better understanding so
now they can be open for the advice that
we give so tell us we talked about
children and this is our future the
future umah is those kids coming up and
in the previous show you can go back to
the Deans show.com and you can see part
one that we did with Dr hatim she about
the million dollar question how to raise
the children and prevent them from going
astray we talked about the early years
Mercy making sure the children aren't
uh in pain that they're being fed that
all their needs are being met and now we
went from Two and up talking about the
timeout method and some practical
examples so when we come back we're
going to continue this here on the dean
show don't go
nowhere I don't say to people I used to
be a Christian I still carry the values
and principles of loving Jesus Christ
and perhaps maybe more than the people
who call themselves Christians so I
think I got the best out of Christianity
by becoming Muslim
so many other things that you can enjoy
without drinking a sip of alcohol death
is the same thing it's not an obstacle
it's not something to cause people to
get completely desperate and start
stopping living their lives No it should
be a motivation it's only one life that
you're going to be living so you better
do it for Allah subhah wa
tala I am not afraid to stand
alone I am not afraid to stand alone if
Li by I am not afraid to stand alone
I am not afraid to stand alone if Li by
I am not afraid to stand
alone I am not afraid to stand alone if
Li I am not afraid to stand
[Music]
alone back here with she Dr hatim so
tell us now we left off from the last
show at the age now we're about
somewhere you know going up three where
so we went from the timeout method how
to discipline them before we go on to
seven what you just said just just a few
more examples so is it safe to say that
the child you can't just let him be
doing whatever he wants there's got to
be some guidelines right and you we gave
some practical examples the timeout
method and how you uh talk to them we
want to also ask you now and if you can
elaborate on what I just said about file
language from the parents cursing bad
behavior do the children pick up on all
these things and then can this be
counter effective if you're not getting
yourself together but you expect a child
now to be Mr Prince or
princess U well F first of all you know
cursing and calling people bad names as
uh
certainly counter the Islam the prophet
peace be upon Him
says a Muslim is not one who curses is
not one who calls names and is not one
who's obscene that's our teachings that
is what the prophet said a Muslim cannot
be this you cannot the tongue you use to
praise the Creator you can't curse with
that tongue absolutely absolutely
and and so going back to the issue of
contradiction that's the worst thing
that the worst quality the person has is
contradiction you know the worst kind of
uh people that are mentioned in the
Quran are the Hypocrites and the
Hypocrites their problem is
contradiction you know actions and
sayings the the the what is inside and
what is outside the exterior and the
interior once you have
contradictions uh then uh that you you
really compromise your integrity you
really compromise your credibility in
this of your child and keep in mind that
kids are not dumb you know they they
actually can can read through the lines
and they can actually see deep into you
and they can actually pick up the clues
that you're really not consistent
consistent you got to be consistent yeah
you absolutely you need to be consistent
yeah and and what what about now the
because this starts off really too if
you're watching Daytime Nighttime drama
on the TV this boob tube that's out out
there what do you got to say about
this uh that do also be not consistent
in your raising of the child because uh
you know when people talk about this is
okay for adults and this is not okay for
children I think that message is really
not making a lot of sense to the
children so you got to be 18 to you know
like here we in America I don't think
that for Muslims that uh issue is uh
such a prevalent problem but you know
you can't buy alcohol and or this and
you can't watch this and or that and you
can't gamble
Andor this many years old PG-13 G but
yeah so the child would say you know so
so what happened to me overnight you
know like yesterday it was Haram and
today it's Halal or yesterday is it's
impermissible today it's permissible
what nothing happened to me consistent
absolutely so so we Muslims should not
be doing this you know you should not be
telling them that there is this is good
for adults not good for kids or this
it's okay for me to do that it's okay
for me to to be obscene it's okay for me
to call names or curse uh it's okay to
me for me to be vulgar to be rough or to
be this or that but is not okay for you
why I mean if it is okay it's okay for
both of us and if it is not okay it's
not okay for both of us uh so that is
one thing that people really need to to
to understand in order for them to be
effective Ive preachers and and and and
reaching out to their kids are these
kids picking up if you're if you're
having like this music playing on the TV
you know the the different uh Jerry
Springer shows Montel William all the
crazy things that are on the TV and now
just the kid the kids in front of the TV
and now you got some peace you feel like
you know what he's quiet now just let
him be but is this some programming
going on profanity promiscuity and now
years pass is this going to have an
influence should this be in the muslim's
house or away from the muslim's house
that's an excellent point because uh by
by H2 you can make phrases and sentences
and by H5 you would have actually
developed the majority of your language
so between two to five uh in terms of
language development that area is very
very sensitive so see what it is that
you are because there is input here the
input is coming from the parents coming
from the TV it's and don't expect that
their input will be one thing and the
output will be a different thing you
know the input whatever you input into
the child will
be you know manifested by the child
thereafter so if the child is is using
profanity or his uh his language is foul
or her language is f then you want to
ask yourself where did this come from
you know it came from what I allowed the
child to be exposed to uh and what and
and part of that is you know my own uh
language so you have to be careful with
your own language if you teach the child
this early on where it's like inshallah
God willing alhamdulillah praise be to
Allah and they go into his language you
know and they they develop with him they
will not only be part of the language
but they also be part of the uh makeup
the the emotional and psychological
makeup of the child the word
alhamdulillah has great power praise be
to Allah
uh and if your child sees that you say
alhamdulillah even when you are in pain
even when you have suffered some loss uh
that that's a great lesson without
giving any lectures without having any
microphone and giving any lectures it's
a great lesson because the child will
then understand that you know we can
even be content even during hard hard
times and we recognize Allah's bounties
and favors on us because they're
uh they
are uh unlimited you you you you know
you can't count them uh so even if I
lost this particular thing that you know
that matters to me there is so much that
I have so now with with the TV what I
like to do now I mean if you do watch
something is it good to I like Huda TV
peace TV there's some Islamic channels
out there is this okay now if the
children along with uh possibly what can
you start reading to him at a young age
you know so what are what are the things
that you can Implement as far as like
knowledge going on from 2 3 4 5 and up
before they go to U because I guess the
first school is is the home school you
know so before they do anything else uh
making sure like the the the bad things
aren't coming in so what can you cut off
and then to replace it what can you
replace it with good
things uh I think that there should be
some control exposure I think that uh um
there should be exposure to sort of like
um you give them samples of of life
outside but nothing bad but again at the
same time uh Huda TV peace TV the dean
show Etc all of that is is is great and
good but there could be also some
programs on Discovery Channel for
instance that you can deem appropriate I
think you need to pre-screen I
prescreening is very important I think
yeah because you do not want your child
to be exposed to something completely
you know because you got all sort turn
commercial you got thumbs I mean this is
the real world you know it's like it's
like a soft porn on just the you know
average commercials there there is there
is too much exploitation of of women
which is which is quite that's the real
subjugation of women it should be it
yeah it should be it should be quite
hurtful to the to women that they're
being used
you know uh for attraction to to grab
attention what the female body is is
being used as a commodity to grab
people's attention even if you're
advertising for a tractor what does a
tractor have to do with a beautiful
woman yeah but it's just like trying to
grab people's attention and I don't want
my child to be exposed to this and I
don't want this uh this emphasis on on
on you know
overemphasis on on sex to be
delivered to my child this early on so
that's the pre-screening we'll come back
here on the de show with some more after
this break don't go
nowhere do not kill a woman do not kill
a child do
not you know going to different
religious leaders Buddhism Hinduism uh
forms of Christianity I even ran into
people from the Nation of Islam feeling
old man do not kill an animal do not cut
a tree down do not poll their water do
not burn their
[Music]
homes back here with Dr hatim PhD MD
giving us some great advice here on the
dean show and we only have a few more
minutes so we want to again we're going
to have to have you back and just
continue this series continue this
series God willing so tell us a more a
few more important points that the
parents should know about and then we'll
go from there on how they can you've
read you've written some books and some
articles where they can continue on
because this is such a vast
topic uh well one of the points that
they want to touch upon is the the issue
of encouragement encouragement is is
very important and uh particularly from
age six and seven uh this issue uh or
this this particular stage of the
child's life is called the stage of
inferiority versus industry uh and the
the key to this stage is encouragement
use less discouragement and more
encouragement so use more positive
reinforcement and less negative reinfor
Give an example please uh I'll give you
an example how you know in fact Z one of
the which are the second generation
Muslims said to Young uh boys uh do not
do not think little of yourselves do not
be little of
yourselves that is om used to invite
young people to consult them on great
matters to follow the sharpness of their
minds or to seeking the sharpness of
their thinking process because adults
could be multifaceted yes but that could
overwhelm your thinking so he wants to
see the unidimensional thinking and the
children have the unidimensional
thinking so when rer invites you that's
the the the the leader of the Muslims he
used to lead TW you know uh more than 20
of the Contemporary countries so when
the the leader of more than 20 of the
Contemporary countries brings the
children over and consult them on
various matters some of them are
important you can imagine how they were
Builders of character they were Builders
of of great leaders and that is what the
prophet PE upon him dead the prophet
hired to be his vice Roy on Mecca when
he was less than 20 M jab was less than
20 when he sent him as an ambassador uh
to Yemen uh and Abdullah Abbas was only
10 when the prophet peace be upon Him
died and Abdullah Zu was was about this
age when the prophet peace be they were
you know contemporaries or the you know
they're equal in age peers Abdullah Zu
and abdah ABB see how much they
benefited from their comp their uh
companionship of the Prophet peace be
upon him because he in he welcomed them
he was warm to them he would shake hands
with the with the children in the street
to give them confidence so that you to
encourage them and give give them
themselves confidence so they become the
leaders of
tomorrow and that's what we fail often
times to do few more in short I'm going
to ask you just uh some some questions
and you tell me good or bad and just
elaborate on for a a moment before we
cut out always screaming at the children
when they do something wrong good or bad
no it's
bad it is bad it is it is basically
ineffective intive yeah well you need to
diversify your response to be effective
because otherwise uh the kid will get
immune against that
screaming uh you develop immunity like
you develop immunity to bugs you develop
immunity to behavior
so when someone has a certain Behavior
you develop immunity to that behavior
even between the spes people need to uh
you know understand that this is quite
an effective way of uh of preaching
public school good or
bad uh if there are alternatives then
bad okay I've heard it being compared to
spiritual
suicide I heard actually this is abdas
from B Institute he was calling it Iman
Warfare oh man so it's avoid the public
schools yeah uh if if there are
alternatives yes if there are
alternatives and there are alternatives
and the communities need Muslim
communities need to come up with more
and more Alternatives not limited to
Islamic schools but also tutoring in the
m in the in the masjids uh for
homeschooled kids if if we do this we
can help a lot of parents who can't do
it alone to do it with a little bit of
help yeah
last closing comments and suggestions
wrapping it up for those sincere parents
who want the best for themselves and
their family what encouragement and
advice do you give them she I think you
always start from and go back to the the
two conditions
of uh the validity of anything we do in
Islam which which is sincerity and
correctness and and sincerity is defined
defined by by complete Devotion to Allah
in that which you do you have to make
sure that you are actually serving his
interest not your limited narrow
personal interest and correctness is by
following the path of the Prophet peace
be upon him walk behind him he's leading
you to the right way and on the right
way to the right ending if you start to
walk away here there you can be uh you
can fall in the traps of the Satan's
walk right right behind him you will get
to where you believe he will get to and
as a Muslim if you believe that he's
getting to Paradise walk right behind
them he'll lead you there that makes
sense it's simple and just in the last
few seconds where can people go to
continue their education and reach more
of your work and your material uh they
can go to MJ online.org uh AMJ
online.org one word they can Al go to
Sharia academy.com M online is the
Assembly of Muslim jurists in America
and Sharia Academy is a Higher Learning
institution may God Almighty Allah
reward you for being us thank you back
again in thanks and thank you for tuning
in to another episode of the dean show
it starts with wanting the treasure is
out there but do you want it God
Almighty Allah has sent us the guidance
through the last and final message of
the Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him
and not much to add after the shake has
told us that we need to stick to the
verbatim word of God gu the Quran and
follow be behind the one that's leading
us to Jenna he's the way the truth and
the light the prophet Muhammad last and
final messenger just the same way that
you would have to not bypass the
teachings of Jesus or Moses or Abraham
you had to teach you had to follow the
teachers not worship them they weren't
Gods Demi gods they didn't call you to
worship themselves but they called you
to follow them because they were the
ones who were teaching us how to get to
Paradise how to be successful not only
in this life but also in the Hereafter
and we have the guidance from the last
and final messenger sent to mankind of
prophet Muhammad peace be upon him so
let's be successful let's have success
in this life and in the next until next
time peace be unto
you