okay so you multiple wives
look at me yeah that's hard now now in
order for me to do that
i got to be muslim no i gotta take my
shahada
are you the modern-day hugh hefner that
you can have you could have
keisha and aisha if you wanted to
like back in the day i mean it was
normal for a person to have more than
one wife
but the average guy has his main chick
side piece or mistress is jump off
and it's funny because the jealousy was
actually like more of a driving force
than anything else
this is my way of life this is the
tradition
yes i'm planning on marrying you but
i'm entitled to having one two three or
four wives you made some comments
recently
suggesting that men are not meant to be
monogamous
i want to elaborate on that well if
she's cool with that
then alhamdulillah that's you
gabrielle how are you doing my brother
you know stranger to the show good good
for the people that don't know you're a
educator convert to islam you're
actually a principal
also in malaysia currently is that
correct yeah i'm an
islamic school principal now an
educational consultant
and you're doing some great also work of
outreach in
in europe yeah i'm romania i was born
there so it's only fair that
it's my responsibility to invite people
to islam and
do a lot of projects there to spread the
message of islam and shall and to help
also the existing muslim community there
uh now recently you you made a a series
actually it's uh one part of islam that
you were discussing and i
just for the audience i want to just put
a disclaimer this is going to be kind of
for some people controversial it
shouldn't be that controversial because
at one time
it really wasn't it was the norm so
things that were norm
at one time became the up norm and
things now that are normal
are actually abnormal so uh uh
gabriel i'm gonna go ahead and play this
video here with you
and then we'll take off and get your
comments on it and kind of uh
mix it in with the series that you did
how's that sound
sounds good it's been done you you are
married
you ain't mad i can't go there just yet
but you got like nine though right
that's hard
that number is inflated it's inflated
that's four yeah i got more than one i
can
go that far okay but i can't go deep
into it just yet that's interesting uh
romani he uh because uh there was a lot
of talk
of akon for those that don't know he's a
very uh famous
uh obviously we don't take him as an
example and he might be doing some
things we don't agree with but
he's someone who is proud to be a muslim
and
he is proud to be someone who has
multiple families and he just made a
correction here that
he doesn't have nine it's not allowed to
have nine uh at one time
families extended families but four and
he was proud of that
uh anything let's continue on yeah okay
so you multiple wives
polygamy yeah hard now now in order for
me to do that
i got to be muslim nah i gotta take my
shahadah you could be mormon
huh you could be mormon mormon no i
can't be warming
don't watch tv
believe it or not you can actually be
christian too it's in the bible get out
of here it's in the bible
let's stop right there uh is it is it in
the are you coming from you're actually
a christian at one time
is it actually polygamy a man marrying
more than one
one wife having an extended family is
that actually in the bible polygamy is a
subject many would rather not talk about
but a man of god has come out in the
open to advocate for the practice
that is almost taboo in a typical home
setup reverend vincent mouloa claims
that he has
biblical barking on polygamy i am saying
what means to be said
and i will say it loudly so very good
friends ran away from me
others decided to in hypocrisy actually
to say that i have error
because i have only talked openly the
things they do in secret
in the bible there are both holy men
with one wife
they are both holy men with many wives
abrahams many wives
isaac has one jacobs four so there's no
problem not an issue
that adult women are more than adult men
definitely then some woman somewhere
however
however born again the yeah however holy
our god during the year
some woman will be without husband
because the women are 10 and the men are
three
as a cancer yeah it is in the old
testament
and it was the standard even at the time
of jesus you know
people think that jesus somehow came and
abolished that law
no he did not whatsoever this was a
common practice
amongst the the the jews the
amongst the previous prophets not only
the prophets i mean prophets you know
didn't people can say
well they're prophets you know you're
not the prophet right it's not
prophets did it to exemplify and to
teach it that it's allowed you know when
the prophet does something
and he specifies something and that
becomes
acceptable to us unless there's a
specific reason or
a specification this is only for the
prophet but in the case of polygyny of
course
this was something not only the prophets
did the people the time it was a
standard of society
even at the time of jesus and and so on
wait wait somebody tell me to buy you
y'all scared i'm definitely scared
definitely
i'm but you can do it all right so so
all right so explain
to
if you wanted to i need you to explain
it
why do you think uh there's a lot of
laughter going i mean this is a serious
topic but why does it like boys turn
into little kids when this topic comes
up
yeah i think this is a problem even with
us muslims right it's becoming a very i
mean one of the things that
muslims love to talk about when they get
together brothers and i think this is a
bit of a
a childish behavior a mistake is we love
to talk about you know
multiple marriages and you know multiple
wives and then jin
or something like that right people like
to talk about jin right like your
brothers get together
that's like the the common topic would
be like oh polygyny and like
jin or something jin stories so um
it's he says i'm scared i'm not sure why
he's scared he's probably scared of if
you know of
i don't know his wife or his headache
but but the funny thing is that a lot of
these rappers and these guys
will go and have girlfriends
you know i mean we we just know forget
about you know just the media
the movie stars the rock stars the pop
stars the rap stars
you always have these scandals of
cheating and
coming out with you know multiple
girlfriends and
what are they scared they're scared i'll
tell you what they're scared they're
scared of commitment
because marriage in islam polygyny is
not
what they're you know it sounds funny to
them they're like oh having multiple
women
wow and they're thinking from which
perspective they're thinking from the
perspective of just
enjoying and having fun right but it's a
responsibility it's a commitment
right yes there are benefits with them
no doubt about it
but it's a huge responsibility and you
know they have no problem having
girlfriends and they you know they
pat themselves on the back but they're
scared of what what's the one word that
they're scared of
marriage commitment and this there
the guy who's interviewing akon he's
kind of like you know
uh talking like you can have so this
aisha and also kadee whatever
the other person's name was but he's
probably most likely most of them
they're already
maybe has a wife and on the side he's
got you know side chick
mistress and he's already practicing
unsanctioned illegal polygamy
oh no i mean this is not uh speculation
this is uh you can find
uh you can find studies of people
admitting to multiple partners
throughout their lives even while
they're married
admitting to being unfaithful and
they're practicing
yeah unlawful no doubt in the side of
allah
you know what i mean and i mean from a
legal
perspective for them in the law of the
country it's not illegal to have
mistresses
and all these things which is kind of
like a weird double standard
and hypocrisy he's like no i'm good i
don't care
it's not that like in africa it's a
tradition so this is just a different
life
oh your wives are african now they're
all american actually
yeah that's what i'm trying to say
i got to be a student right now i'm in
therapy class how do you pull this off
sir
but it's not really nothing you pull off
like think about it look at the average
person today right you got your main
girl
you got your side piece i don't got
another guy
right listen i hear all that talking
i'm just saying i don't know how y'all
title them
or how y'all say it but if i go down we
are going down
that's new jack city
this may not apply to you or my brother
oh
or whoever else that it may not apply to
but the average
guy has his main chick
a side piece or mistress his jump off
and whatever else knew that come about
it could be a one-night stand it could
be somebody you meet the club whatever
the case may be
now at the end of the day
we can say that that your girl don't
know what you're doing
or don't know what's happening but she
knows you better than you know yourself
she know what the hell you out there
doing bro she just don't call you out on
it
well what do you think before we
continue on he's he mentioned some
either got a jump off
side chick and he went down that's the
first time i heard that one to jump off
that's some new sling
have you heard that one jump off no i
haven't heard the jump
i haven't heard the jump off so uh but
it's
basically like i think side chick is
more like more regular jump off it's
just like a drive-by type of thing
that's like a one-night one-night stand
something like that
yeah yeah okay and you see do you see
how derogatory these terms are right
very derogatory yeah
but that's the reality though he's
speaking he's speaking truth and i know
the guys are kind of like
flipping and flopping around their body
language if anybody can read is it seems
like they're
lying yeah yeah i mean you know that's
that's just
if it's not them in society in general
in society
he's what akon is saying is the truth
yeah
and then uh synonymous with that is one
night stand i mean and then islam
protects you from doing the walk of
shame then
you've heard the walk of shame
you've heard that term walk of shame
walk of shame like in the morning
the the person is and feels ashamed
because now they
they wear a jump off and in the morning
they leave you know the makeup's all
messed up they're leaving
or the guy and then they just feel
usually it's the woman who gets
abandoned and abused and amused
because there's no commitment like you
said and
women have this tendency of
well it's actually natural
if you tell her that this is what it is
she builds and starts to structure her
life around what you tell her
you got nice coffee back there
right so that's how women do
because they're very emotional creatures
so they're going to build their life
around
you and what makes you happy not only
that but
what makes you comfortable so if you
tell look baby this is what it is in my
life this how it is
she builds her life around that now so
now
imagine being a person that caters
your their their whole way of existence
around the way you live
and then one day finds out that
everything you've been telling her was a
lie
so now she has structured her whole life
around a lot
and then you do then i mean every
woman is different
how they react to it it depends on the
woman
but they gonna react my approach is just
totally different
i keep it all the way 100.
what do you think about that he's
putting acons like he's keeping it real
and
he's talking about being honest being
upfront not hiding nothing not being
someone who's like promiscuous and then
like everything your whole nation is
built on a lie he's talking about you
know
this is how it is you know this is what
i want this is what god almighty allowed
me
and then uh the other guy he said he's
talking more like a pimp he's thinking
from a different
what do you think yeah i mean nikon is
is being a real man he's saying look i'm
putting my cards on the table
and this it is what it is right and he
talked about how the woman structures
her life around that man
definitely if you're you know straight
up forward you tell this is how it is
and the woman is either going to accept
that or leave it you know like but at
least you
kind of give her that that opportunity
you know to make that decision ahead
ahead of time right but you can tell
these guys are not
you know they're not being serious you
can tell again by their body language
and i guess he called him right on it
he's thinking about from a pin
perspective you know what i mean
because that's the problem with when it
comes to collision when it comes to
having multiple
wives they don't think as
of them as wives they think of them as
partners partners for what for sexual
intercourse
so that's kind of the only thing that's
on the on the mind of
of some of these men right but yes that
is part of it
no doubt that islam doesn't shy away
from that and that's why it's called
that's why it is part of nica but
there's there's there's a responsibility
and a strong you know
manhood and masculinity that comes with
it that
only a committed man can do it
he also before we continue on he also
talked about back in
in africa did he say africa that's our
tradition but with me today here
are my four respected wife
so now how are you going to blame a
whole society
who's actually it seems like where he's
coming from it's the norm
and condemn a whole society and then
push your cultures and norms on them
yeah but that's that's again the
contradiction right
like when people disagree with with
pollution
and they basically they
don't disagree with doing it they just
disagree with
institutionalizing it or legalizing it
because
by nature most people do it so when the
muslims bring it forward we say look we
have a system of how to do it
and it's coming from the divine and it
tells you how to do it properly now if
both males and females men and women
accept that system and that's where i
think he made a mistake he should not
told no you can be a
mormon or a christian or whatever no
yeah you should take your shadow bro if
you want to do it properly
right then you because he said the guy
said why should i should take my shahada
right now which means the guys knows he
even knows what shahada is
he had a good dawah opportunity right
there huh to break it down for everybody
if you want to do polygenic properly you
want to know how it is not the mormons
not the christian way because they lost
it i mean they still do it but
illegal or unlawfully perfect yeah you
know the muslim right so next time eicon
you got that opportunity you got a
chance to break down what the shahada is
what's the purpose of life you could
invite it to islam he could have broke
it down
from there but uh maybe next time econ
let's continue on we're almost done with
this and
yeah so it's nice okay let's put this
away it's as simple as this
let's say you married i am
oh we're not trying to he's trying to
look good in front of his wife
on camera
so what i'm saying is that makes you
look guilty you don't have to try hard
if you're a good person
can i tell you something yeah i'm sorry
if you're a good husband you ain't got
to wave the white flag to everybody
that's very true i don't got to do it
that's very true that's very true
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
[Music]
right and he meets a girl and
the girl that he's with now that he's
taken with he's already had
a conversation saying listen this is my
way of life this is the tradition
yes i'm planning on marrying you but
i'm entitled to having one two three or
four wives
all right now you explain that to number
one
okay from day one
if she's cool with that
then alhamdulillah that's you if she
ain't cool with that
then she's not the wife for you if
that's what you plan to do so he
he said uh wha what do you have to say
he was like alhamdulillah all
i mean he's talking about yeah being
transparent uh
but theoretically you know because
theoretically this works and
theoretically a lot of times
you would tell your first wife yeah
maybe this is what i want to do this my
life
and she might say okay honey no problem
yeah
but things change with time and maybe we
can discuss that as well so
theoretically is correct
practically this is when it gets a bit
tricky but yeah i mean
if you're planning to do that then it's
it's something that you should
bring forward from the beginning so that
the woman can at least have
a choice because later on later on once
kids come
once time goes by and it becomes an
issue
it becomes an issue if she was not ready
for her if she's not willing to accept
it
yeah let's let's come back to that where
you said we can get tricky and then
we'll go
because that's what you talk about in
your series now on a woman's standpoint
this what happens two things happen
first of all you keep it real with her
so she
keeps that respect for you because you
didn't lie to her you told her exactly
what you feel
and what she's getting into and number
two now she can prepare herself mentally
to say okay you know what
if i deal with nori and this is what he
wants
is this something that i want in my life
you follow what i'm saying
now she can make that decision because
you gave her the option to make that
decision
okay but have you ever made a bad were
you like yo
yo what's up baby y'all trying to get
with you she's like
and then you like i don't want no
with a wife and you just lied for that
moment he was like
got no violence
come on never bro never never he wasn't
in mexico one night
no listen there was no stuttering there
did you notice that acon was like no
never he's asking him did you ever cheat
did you ever just you know lie
uh and commit adultery zinna he said no
see i mean that's that's something you
can appreciate him i mean
as you said from the beginning the
disclaimer was that we don't agree with
this guy and many of the things that he
does
and maybe the way he portrays things and
he does his videos and all that
so there's a bit of a you know um
contradiction there but i mean he's
straight up he's he's very you know he
didn't he didn't
you know he didn't flip-flop he didn't
stutter he said never
you know what i mean he's just saying it
straight up
and you got to respect that i mean
because how things a lot of times get
normalized you have this whole
all these letters in alphabet that are
getting you know
uh normalized people are certain
lifestyles according to these letters
and now the p okay is something that
even the muslims are scared to talk
about you got to give him some credit
he's being mad enough he's talking about
it so what do you think about there
to normalize to start talking about this
issue right
we are trying i mean talking about
things raising awareness raising
awareness is part of education
if you don't educate people about this
issue
it's going to be pushed on the side
people are still going to practice it a
wrong way
it's going to be you know buried there
that used to be a tradition it used to
be something that the africans there or
the arabs there or what not
and whatever and people are just gonna
do it illegally
unlawfully and specifically unlawfully
in the sign of god that's what
concerns us uh the most and as you said
then
other sexual and you know sexuality type
of behaviors
you know get normalized and take over
you know uh the the divinely given right
by god to man so it's weird like okay
you allow for all these letters of the
alphabets to be put down there
yet you deny this one thing that god has
allowed
through commitment it's perfectly
aligned with human nature
it is positioned perfectly to solve many
of humanity's problems and specifically
many of women's problems
and yet still the world was able to
convince
these women that it's not like that and
they're the ones who are fighting it
specifically muslim women sadly
and while it's it's there to to help
them oh you know this before i was who i
was
yes i don't you know this my father got
too wild
so what i'm saying is at the end of the
day pops too
[Laughter]
if if that happens i tell her straight
up look
look it's right now i don't even try to
hide it i let him know straight up
i'm married and i got this amount of
kids
and they come first how many kids you
have enough
i got six at a possible i don't know
where the other one is
possible i mean this is uh this is a
good point let's stop here uh
and we'll continue on just so i want to
address this uh did he say i got six and
a possible and then it's like
and one i don't know where he's at
something like that where this is the
destruction
of the home the family you got children
that are coming up they don't know who
their fathers are and it's a laughing
matter but this is this is uh
the root of most of the evil that's
happening in the world would you say
yeah see islam one of the objectives of
islam is to preserve the lineage
okay one of the makassar of the sharia
is to preserve the lineage
and when you are involved in
lawful religion it it you know
your father is and of course you know
your mother is well this guy was saying
that i got a few kids here and possibly
a few others
somewhere else but i don't know right as
for akon he says
he's choosing not to say how many he has
how many wives he said
more than one how many kids he said
enough right because
maybe he's he doesn't want people to
give him or hassan or something
but he's keeping things private that's
that which is a very
good thing to to actually do but
see islam sharia has come to preserve
especially one of the things is the
honor of the muslim as well right
so these people have no honor i mean
when it comes to they do it
in a dishonorable way and when the
muslim does an honorable way because
again remember number one
the marriage in islam is first and
foremost before
the butterflies and the beautiful
romantic
you know this scenery it is a contract
it is a contract why people be like
that's not so romantic that's not
it's to protect it is a contract to make
sure
that people understand what they're
doing it's a contract in front of god
and towards each other and then comes
the romance and everything all that's
nice and you know
and cute i got a possible running around
there i got a space here
i'm sorry and once they know i mean at
that point if all fails y'all can
always just
be friends but if a woman knows what you
should get into brochure in the problem
we were just in the club just the other
day me and my little brother
and re-knowing what everybody already
know the chicks came to me asking to be
a wife she introduced herself to me as
his next wife like hi
i'm your brother's next wife i'm like he
even met you yet a couple things i want
to address maybe you can too
uh when we talk about things that
obviously uh uh muslims should not be in
the nightclubs we understand that
and there's a beautiful and this i want
this is because any time we have a
time to educate i think we should do
that and then
i and hopefully doesn't get to our
brother akon
you know and i think this would he
because you never know a lot of times
maybe people don't
uh give him the message they look at him
at somebody that maybe is unapproachable
you can't give advice but that's the
whole thing is to give advice to your
brother who you love and we want the
best for him
and i think what do you think brother
when i think about this hadith that next
time a muslim is about to do an
interview
he can say look uh i can't sit at a
table where there's alcohol because my
messenger
prophet muhammad he said that if you if
i believe in allah in the last day if
you believe in the lost day
you shouldn't sit at the table as i'll
call what do you have to say this is
just a side tangent before we just jump
into the rest
yeah i totally agree i mean there's many
things we can pick at him
i think we picked this clip just to
highlight but i don't want to pick it's
not picking on him because i'm
looking at we're not picking on you icon
we just you know uh
we love it we want the best for you but
just for others who are seeing this and
hopefully you know they can benefit and
not not follow in those pistols
i'm sure that aikon knows what he's
doing i i doubt that he doesn't know
what he's doing based on the way he's
talking
uh he knows about polygamy and he's
doing it right he's so insistent on
marriage
i think he understands that you know
where his inner stands and he definitely
understands her alcohol and all that
stuff
right so being a nightclub as you said
and whatnot
but why can't i had why would you well
how would you i don't want to spend a
lot of time on this but let me just
direct this i remember
one time i met uh one brother
years years ago he said i go to the
nightclub i don't drink
i don't i don't uh dance i just you know
go to give dawah
right what do you think because he said
because these people because and his
logic was
that you know i'm not going to get them
over i have to go get them
i got to go to their place yes so i
can't
these people i need to go save them so i
put he puts himself into the
uh nightclub right i mean i can bring
the evidence but first and foremost i
don't think anyone with any sound
logic would agree to that because you
know your environment right
number one the prophet sam said you are
on the way of your friends
and you're surrounded by these people
you are on their way if you are
to die in a certain place you'll be
resurrected in the same position
right so you don't want to be
resurrected there that's number two uh
number three the
allah
he said don't come close to cena so
anything that'll be conducive
towards you know which is the
environment of drinking and partying and
dancing and all that
we know what happens after the club
after the club is the after party right
as rkl used to say right so uh
it it just doesn't make sense man
there's all the evidence that are
pointing against muslims ever being in
this kind of environment and you can't
find no malik ah no malik's angels in
these places huh the angels will not be
there the devils are going to be there
no doubt
about them so you're not you're in a
house that's for the house of shaitaan
right there where all the
all of the bad stuff's happening so we
don't want to be in those places huh
the point i want to make was he was
saying his brother was saying or whoever
in the background they were painting a
scenario where women were actually
wanting because a lot of times you hear
that no what woman
in her right mind would accept this but
we're hearing the opposite here
right like some women they know that
this is what is all about
and they will position themselves in
that position and say hey you know okay
i understand this guy is about marriage
so i'm gonna come here as as his wife
you know what i mean i
to i want to be his wife not his
girlfriend and
let her know she let him know that she
will that happened to a regular dude
because the regular dude ain't
communicate that right
you follow like if i already
communicated that the woman comes to me
already knowing what it is
now you haven't communicated that so
she's coming to you knowing what it is
to her
all right so how do we blend this in
with your series now you did a series
that
was actually addressing some of the
common misconceptions and you were just
breaking it down people can watch that
on your channel
it was like what almost a 15 20 part
series on it
yeah and why and why did you feel uh
this was something that
more you feel more people should talk
about like acon's talking about it he's
proud to talk about it
but it seems like some people they just
shy away and especially some some
imam scholars they uh they don't want to
really touch upon this but you felt it
was important so you did this series why
is it
important to talk about this and to
create normalcy in this
right so i mean having been in the
community for
quite some time now and having been an
imam and a
khatib and you know school principal and
dealing with parents dealing with
communities being a counselor
i've seen over the years more than you
know a decade and a half
this issue coming up you know over and
over again
and it's happening polygyny is being
practiced whether people like it or not
it's part of the the natural you know
makeup of human beings
and it's happening but what we realize
is also that there's problems
people don't know how to practice it
both males and females
okay both males and females but it's
happening
you can't stop it as much as people want
to put laws around it they want to put
red tape around it they want to put
whatever they want to do
restrictions there's movements against
it in the end
it's happening and you can tell like the
western society is coming now with that
term poli amore
and whatnot it's it's just happening so
myself
i said look people came to me with
issues
problems and i said okay let's start a
series
because education is so important in
addressing some of these taboo
problems within polygyny and
try to give some advice and some
solutions
on how people can do it the right way on
both sides because a lot of people think
that it's only men
who make the mistake in polygyny and
they're always unfair
and you know lying and hiding and
whatnot but no it's on both sides
females make the mistake as well
so the series was focused on addressing
one by one some of these issues and also
testing the community and understanding
where do they stand when it comes to
polygyny how do they feel about it are
they willing to accept it
is this because this is something that's
part and parcel
of islam so where does this stand why
would they not accept it also to look at
that
why the changes why the conditioning and
the
you know the changes that have taken
place within the muslim community
to the point where some people totally
deny it
you know and you're denying something
that's part of the sunnah the prophet
sallallahu alaihi
so that was the objective of the series
right and
you know there's been a lot of good
feedback i want to say that
majority of the feedback was positive
before i go to my next questions just
one more clip here
because it goes in line with my next
question you made some comments recently
suggesting that men are not meant to be
monogamous
i want to elaborate on that well i was
just speaking from an
honest male's perspective from me i'm
not going to speak for all men
but i know if all men were cloned to be
me
i don't think it's possible you're
married yeah are you monogamous in
marriage
no how does your wife handle that
they just know it's me i mean she loves
me for who i am
would it bother you if she were not
monogamous yes it would
so it's a double standard actually it's
not because men and women aren't the
same
a woman just don't wake up one day and
say okay well i'm gonna sleep with that
guy
but a guy do wake up one day and say i'm
gonna sleep with that woman
women hero of a lot of men
and you have children yeah
would you care if they grew up that way
too you wouldn't mind it well
what i do i try to teach them life
taking nature into account i think a lot
of rules are built without nature being
taken into an account
and that's what creates the conflict
next so that's my next question
are men created monogamous no doubt
when we look at the history of mankind
men were always kind of leaning
towards pollution does that mean all men
no but in nature the way they are men
throughout the history of mankind and
development
have been labeled as as polygenis
now not always in marriage but we can
see
that their nature has that desire
to procreate to be with more women
i'm sorry this is not an endorsement but
we know that soldiers the way
you know they would rape they would go
and try to get as many women
um you know that was just something it's
the men who go to strip clubs it's the
now i'm gonna talk about that the change
in fitna and what's been happening in
society as well
but it's usually the men who are seeking
this
out why because it's part of their
nature
and the sharia is meant to
fine tune and protect the nature of
human beings
and specifically in this case men
because men were created that with this
desire
to have more than one woman and the
sharia comes as a
as a as a medicine to make sure
that it puts it in the right place and
it you know heals it and
protects it and does it with a proper
objective which is
building family which is yes taking your
desire in the
correct way in the lawful way and you
know
ensuring continuity of of the human race
right as for the woman the woman is not
like that the woman
is naturally not like that
okay and you can look at science you can
look at studies
i know some women would say that's not
true i would love to have more than one
man
because what's been happening with media
and with the frustration
of the wrongful practice of polygyny
the unlawful practice of polygamy a lot
of women
got upset and they started spinning the
wheel the other way around
and they changed their fitra and there's
been movements to push for that
where women force themselves and of
course the fitra can change
and women have become you know where
they take on more partners
and more males and so on and that's not
something natural for them and that's
the sharia never
gave a solution for that or some kind of
adjustment towards that or leeway you
know
because that's not part of the nature is
there let's you mentioned the word
science
is there some science to back up this
being the nature of man that he's built
for this role more than a monogamous
rule and
sadly sometimes the scientifical um you
know
arguments will say that in the animal
kingdom the males
and that's not correct actually because
in the animal kingdom you'll find
a lot of you know examples the animal
kingdom is not the standard for how
males are we are not or how
human beings are we're not you know we
are animals
as in the classification animalia you
know homo sapiens or whatever but these
are scientifical
you know uh terminology that people have
taken as like okay this is
the way so you know but human beings
specifically
males human beings throughout the
history of mankind
they have always proven to want to be
with more
than one woman have you heard of this
term the coolidge effect
the coolidge effect no i haven't
this also uh this is also something
where
it discusses goes back more towards
science and
and this area where it also demonstrates
the programming of man to be this more
of his nature
i've also heard the chimpanzees studies
also so this is the myth of monogamy
books have been written out about this
you see a lot of open relationships they
call them
many uh celebrities where you know you'd
be surprised how many celebrities
who are out there brad pitt uh being one
of them you know with their wives they
call it an open relationship
but this is just allowing for the man
to practice illegal polygamy
right and that's how they've met that's
how they've managed to stay together
actually so long because they've had a
open relationship which means like go
ahead you can do your thing
yeah have you heard about this yeah i've
heard about that yeah
that's right and that's the funny thing
is that it's been around for a long time
and um people do it but yet they have
the audacity when islam comes in with
some rules and commitments like there is
you know it's like it's like acorns
being attacked there right i mean
we're not you know but it's just that we
play that kid
it's like oh my god you know like people
are so it's like they never seen it or
never heard about it
like they've never seen a polygamous man
but it's the key word here for him is
marriage
right they're so shocked if they were to
replace them oh mr akon have you slept
with many women in your life right
and like yeah about 20 30. oh okay cool
cool you know
but oh you're married oh my god
oh you're polygamous oh really it's like
you know
isn't that like just if you want to
spell out hypocrisy it's like in big
letters
isn't it just look at their body
language right it's so funny i mean
they're just kind of because they only
did
yeah wow because just to break it down
for you know is
even simpler i mean what you're saying
is i mean here you have the same thing
unrestricted okay men going to
call girls escort services dating
still married but open relationships
celebrities doing all over
they're practicing it it's there no
problem everybody is
quiet about it or accepted it you had
the guy who recently died what was it
hugh hefner and you got someone else
many of those replacing them they hold
them up to some high standard
are you the modern-day hugh hefner and
like that image one guy with like eight
women like you do or half does society
has said
certain things are okay and certain
things are super bad
that had been going on for like
thousands of years
like back in the day i mean it was
normal for a person to have more than
one wife
um you know not that long ago if you
you know if you won a battle you would
rape and pillage and you would steal
stuff from the village you'd have sex
with all the women and that was fine
but now you have over here like you it's
just simple now you just put commitment
responsibility marriage
and oh my god oh my god omg
and that spells hypocrisy that's
hypocrisy right there
double standards double standard
hypocrisy let's get let's get into like
uh some of the things that
you've seen from people's reaction to
your series um
terms like that person should just be
more spiritual you talk about this
not separating the physical from the
spiritual
break this down how you uh refute it or
you answer some of these uh
doubts questions whatever you want to
call them yeah i mean
again people make up their own
explanations or their own
reasons for why they don't want to
accept polygamy right and these are
we're talking here about
specifically we're going to talk about
muslims okay with with our commitment
it's our prerogative it's our right
to discuss our own community so
the muslims have built this this this
explanation these schemas
to kind of convince themselves as to why
they wouldn't accept this or
as to why this wouldn't be something
that would work uh with them
so one of these arguments is that look
if men
feel like they should just lower their
gaze they should just fast
they should just uh become more
spiritual pray more
why do they need this carnal desire
right so they use this terminology
that's imported from the
non-muslims right and it's packaged in
such a way
to make the muslim man who
is maybe interested or would like to do
pollution for whatever
reason we're not going to go now into
the reasons for polygyny
and so i know because that's another
issue people we can get to that as well
for whatever reason it is permissible if
a person
is willing and wants to do it right so
they come up with these things and they
say
okay you should fast but i say to them
but the prophet sent faster and he was
religious
okay uh then pray more and be more
spiritual
but the prophet saw was the most
spiritual and he was poligist
uh but you should um you know take in
consideration the
the feelings of this woman and and the
prophet sallam did that
no doubt about it right so no matter how
they want to move around you cannot
escape
that the best men that have walked this
earth the best creation of allah
practice polygamy okay and
rather than people trying to find
excuses or trying to make themselves
feel good or
justified their their lack of acceptance
they should ask the question as to
why did the prophet saws did this what
are the benefits
if i'm a believer and allah has
legislated something clearly
in the quran the beginning then
i should ask and i should try to seek
the wisdom behind it because
it is anything any ayah in the quran
any legislation any injunction it's a
solution
or a guidance for mankind that's why
it's called an ayah it's a sign
you know like a sign go this way go that
way right you need signs on your path
every ayah in the quran is a guidance
so we are living in a world
that needs guidance look around
ourselves
we are suffering the degradation of
of ethics and morals the wars
the the the just the destruction the
pollution
the the loss of of nature of identity
confusion you name it i mean we are not
in a good time and a good place yet
yet supposedly we're in the best time
where with the most
free and we have solutions for
everything the world is suffering so the
muslims should look and say
wait a second all these other systems
have
not solved the world problems including
the problem of divorce lack of marriage
women being
single uh and and and
and islam is a solution why am i not
willing
to at least look at it give it a chance
why are not people talking about it oh
you cannot do it right
it's not fair okay let's educate people
on how to do it fair why aren't imams
talking about it
when i talk to them they say bro i'm
scared for my life
i you know my wife's gonna kill me the
board is gonna fire us
the community is gonna come after us
yeah but
you're not solving the problem because
the things
these issues are still happening and
you're supposed to educate the community
so you have to you have to address these
things people need to understand
the objective the intention of what we
are doing here what we're talking about
today
usually we'll hear it always shifted
towards the man you know his desire his
this that and the other
but isn't this a woman's prerogative
isn't this her right
isn't this also stepping where you
people want to tell women what to do but
i mean
this is and make this bad but like in
the acon video they got
women lined up to want to be his wife
isn't this you're taking away
her right also this is her right you
know
yeah and this is this is this is her
consent
yeah one of the things i say myself is
that
usually the arguments against polygyny
and all the problems that are brought
forth are usually from the first wife
perspective
right no one thinks about the other
women around
and it's funny because the jealousy was
actually like more of a driving force
than anything else
um if girls see other hot girls that are
interested in you
it's you know i think the most powerful
like driving factor
like more so than the money and the fame
and all the other well maybe not more
than fame
and and i i've kind of tallied it and
based on the feedback that i received
about 85 of women
and i've even done a uh
you know a chilling or a survey about 85
percent of women or more
are saying that they agree with polly
and they're willing to be
85 80 that's a big number 85 percent 85
yes okay that's according to your
research and your data so
you know they're saying that we're okay
we understand we're willing to
as long as the man does it right he's a
good man and so on
uh the other people when you look at it
it's like
no i don't want to agree you know i
don't i don't believe in this i don't
accept this
but see those the 85 which is majority
of the women watch i'm just talking
about the ones to watch it's a sample
population
okay what about them what about
these women who maybe have been divorced
or maybe not maybe they're burgers i
don't know
uh or maybe who are they think this is
the solution that i want like for
example i was in a conference
where um this issue was brought up and
i said to him and i said look um when
you go
for a job interview what is the first
thing that people look at
it is experience right why do they look
for experience because that
is closest to making sure that they hire
the right person who will be able to
sustain that work relationship
so i said the same thing in marriage you
know when you look at someone who has a
track record of knowing how to do it
okay then of course you got to maximize
the potential of this marriage working
out
and they agreed they agreed they said
yes this makes a lot of sense
and a lot of women are willing i would
say again
from the muslim ummah from what i've
seen what i've received that some way a
lot of women are saying that okay
it's okay we're willing to do it but
then there's a fraction of women who are
saying
no we don't accept this this is horrible
and so on but
this 15 doesn't think about the other 85
who is going to be without a husband
or who will sometimes have to compromise
for a man who is
lesser of a man who's maybe not i mean
you know masculinity is under attack
today 21st century it's very hard to
find real men
okay so these women have the chance of
being
a real man who has a track record who
was able to provide was able to take
care
so but these other women are reducing
their chance they're fighting against it
they're stopping it there's no such
thing as you know uh wish for your
sister what you wish for yourself right
which is one of the principles of islam
people don't think about that in that in
that matter anymore
so it's it's a huge issue because our
society
is suffering you have 40 year old 50
year old
women virgins who have never been
married because it's so
difficult to find marriage you have
widows you have
single mothers you have you know all
kinds of
you know dynamics within the female
population who are
single and cannot get married they're
scared to get married to some new guy
who's coming with no experience and they
would rather go with someone who has a
track record
but then they people stick you know
sticks in the in the wheels and they
stop these things and they
cause problems and they bring legal
issues and
they they form unions and and marches
and
and you know all kinds of uh you know
movements to fight
this while in the back door on the
backyard
the non-muslims are practicing it
illegally and unlawfully day and night
and maybe the muslims are watching these
shows
and laughing about it and thinking huh
it's so cute and so nice
you know but uh it's it's it's horrible
it's it's a horrible double standard
it's just a horrible situation we're in
and i think we need to to address it
more and more and people shouldn't be
upset
one of my prior guests uh he
muhammad he also talks about and he
coined the term
first wife syndrome what have you seen
relating to
what you said the objections uh usually
come from
what has been your experience with that
where a lot of times
uh the person feels betrayed they feel
like uh
then the family comes in and says you
know what's wrong with you that he had
to do that and then that messes up her
self-esteem her confidence and
how do you address that yeah i mean
again you know it's the first wife she
thinks that if a man is going to want to
marry another woman
that there's a problem with her and
that's not the case all the time
sometimes it is the case and it is one
of the reasons why
sometimes a man can marry another woman
for example if
the woman cannot have a child if she
cannot satisfy him in in you know in a
sexual way
that doesn't mean the the man wants to
divorce her you know what i mean maybe
he loves her maybe he wants to be with
her but at the same time he's not going
to put himself in a difficult situation
so the first wife syndrome you know she
feels like she's betrayed why are you
betrayed because your husband wants to
marry another woman
why is that a betrayal it's not a
betrayal unless you think about it that
way
you know that's that's not something and
how it should be interpreted
your your husband is just taking one of
the
objectives and one of the allowances of
islam and
there might be nothing wrong with you
you know what i mean and sometimes the
men also have to reassure their wives
that
honey you know there's nothing wrong
it's just this is just the way it is and
this is just what i'm doing there's an
objective for it
and and i'm you know fulfilling that
duty and allah is pleased when i'm with
you
and allah is pleased when i'm with the
other wife you know what i mean
but sadly because society is
is shaped in such a way the family's
gonna get involved
they're gonna make her feel even worse
there's gonna be a lot of whispers you
know
from people saying you know divorce him
you know
put the ultimatums down take the kids uh
smear his reputation
start calling him you know a sexual i
don't know what and this and that
and subhanallah there's horror stories i
mean marriages break up so
fast and a lot of times the men will
just stop
and will just be slapped and just kind
of submit
because they don't want to lose their
children they don't want to lose their
family
don't think that a man decides to get
married to second or third wife
thinking that yeah whatever i'm just
going to lose my first family it's okay
it's all good no
they want to keep everyone together he
just wants to do
something that pleases allah he wants to
yeah okay why not please himself in a
lawful manner
okay because subhanallah so many of
these of the men
you know who who would love to get
married to another woman
and sometimes they say no no you know i
can't do it. but subhanallah they are
tempted they are engaged sometimes in
unlawful
you know business even though they have
a wife it's not about single men it's
about
men who are married muslims like i have
some counseling sessions
with muslims who are married and commit
sinner
and i ask the brothers bro why don't you
just get married
uh it's easier to go to massage parlor
and you know get a finishing
he says because there's you know my wife
she she said that if i get married she
will divorce
in some cases and this is not a journal
this is not a joke i repeat this is not
a joke
some women do say it's okay for my
husband
to go to a prostitute once in a while
but no marriage
i will not tolerate me i've heard this
i've seen this i have
you know specifically in certain arab
cultures it is very very very popular
okay where the women and will say that
then hey
it's okay you have uh you know a tough
time once in a while you wanna
go you know i i'm not gonna think about
it do but there's no
marriage okay you just come back to me i
mean
how how do you allow
and put up with your husband disobeying
allah committing zina
which is a major sin just because of
your arrogance of thinking that you own
him
you know that he's only yours i mean
this is not something that that makes
sense
i want women to to remove their emotions
for a few minutes you know to remove
those those emotions those those i know
there's going to be some heat
but just to think rationally and to
think
they are and to think and so i've had
interviews with women
in their 30s in their 40s professional
women
counselors who have gone past that
emotional
you know rebellion let's say
because of their life experiences they
have gone through certain
problems and they say i appreciate
what you're saying and i would
appreciate a man like this
who can do this because he's a real man
he has shown commitment and i will take
a poligist man
over a single man any day
any day there's women who speak like
this
and there's a lot of them and these
women will never be able to
or you know i hope they do but they'll
be having a hard time to find a husband
because of the interference of other
women who are just
not having it does a
man have to have an excuse a political
excuse does he have to
have uh people will say that this was
for
there's the time issue at that time you
know that was then
there was men going to wars and it's not
the same and then some people come up
and say okay no this eye is actually
talking about the orphans and then you
also have
people saying that look this is going to
break up the homes and the families
what do you say to that okay first of
all the target argument is flawed
there's never such a thing as a time
argument when it comes to
islam and uh why if it would be just
something like
okay the clothing that was part of the
arabs you know what i mean
like a certain thing then you can say
okay this was part of their culture and
we're in a different culture
and fine but this issue specifically is
legislated and mentioned in the quran so
let's put that to rest there's no such
thing as a
it happened back then oh would you ride
a camel today
you know you know people come up with
those kind of silly arguments right the
prophet saws said brother camel are you
going to write a cable today huh you
want to do the same thing
come on man i mean subhanallah you know
other than
allah telling us to look at the way the
camel was created
allah doesn't legislate issues on the
camel but allah legislates
issues around that's number one number
two
with regards to a reason oh you know
this is for this or
or fans or uh look no doubt that islam
has a
a reason for everything and yes if a
woman is a widow hamdulillah you can
marry her yes if there's war and there's
a shortage of men
polygin is a solution yes if there's uh
you know orphans and and women who are
divorced
and you know older women and so on islam
will offer the solution religion is the
solution
yet putting all that aside there
needs to be no other reason other than a
person wants to get married
and if the woman accepts and the man
accepts
who is there to interfere and to tell
him that this is not right or not
correct
this is something and
why islam is protected
then there's no need for these debates
because see
not only has the quran been protected by
allah
but also the interpretation is protected
to the example of the prophet sallallahu
alaihi
so you look has the prophet done that
he's done it
did he marry only with those and this
and that
you know subhanallah the prophet sallam
married many women
and for different reasons and sometimes
for no reason whatsoever was there good
outcomes out of these marriages
yes of course alhamdulillah yeah
people say but he was a prophet but the
sahaba's also married after
and the tambane and the terrible terrain
and to very very recent
this was a practice of most of
the world you know so there's no
arguments that
you know it's or only for this reason or
that reason
and so on and so forth yeah that's a
good point so you have the last final
messenger sent to mankind even before we
started that
when we opened up with aikon he
mentioned the bible you confirmed as a
former christian
who accepted islam that this is actually
all the prophets
that were mentioned in the bible almost
all of them had
multiple wives i don't like almost all
of them but definitely
some of them like you know suleiman and
others uh you know we know
uh jacob okay had uh you know two wives
and they were sisters you know right
yeah
both of his wife were sisters right at
that time it was a lot
uh you know ibrahim and others had
more than one wife no doubt and these
were the best of mankind
these are the best examples to mankind
then you have the last and final
messenger sent to mankind prophet
muhammad you mentioned him
then the best of generations you have
the sahaba and those that follow
and then that just kept on it was the
norm and then what we find out is that
you had the greco-roman culture they end
up outlawing it
but they said you can have only one wife
but you can have as many concubines
and then we're kind of mimicking that
system today's right and then the church
actually there's no prohibiting of it in
the bible the text but then the church
also political push pressure they end up
making
uh changing the the law so then then we
also talk about
the science behind it you uh you have
this also
people can check this is this this is
how god almighty not only sanctioned it
but he made man
to be in this way
to carry this responsibility and so
there really
if you talk about there's really no
argument but people are saying that look
this is just causing more problems it's
wrecking uh the homes what do you say to
that
well look there's no doubt that some
it's not polygamy that's racking homes
it's
maybe some men and some women
who are not able to submit and to follow
the correct path that they're wrecking
the home so collision is not the problem
it's it's people who don't know how to
practice and hence that's why we're
having this show that's what we're
trying to raise awareness and we hope
we pray that more scholars and more
knowledgeable people
start coming up with more uh you know
ways and then reasons why people should
should be doing this
but with the issue of wrecking homes and
so on
when will the home be wrecked it's what
happens
why why does it escalate to that
usually what would happen is the man
let's look at a scenario i mean and this
is a natural scenario right
so man wants to marry woman
second wife okay second one let's see
happens right
he comes to his first wife says honey
i want to get married again what will
happen
it's not like the woman is going to say
masha'allah my husband
may allah bless you put barakah and fear
allah with your wife
give us equal days give us equal money
i'm so happy that you're doing this
inshallah you're helping the sister
protecting her this is a sunnah
alhamdulillah right no that's not gonna
happen she's gonna be like what
crying falling on the floor she's gonna
call her parents
she might call the police she might try
to take the kids and run away in the car
it's gonna be screaming crashing this
and that
this is what usually what i've seen in
some of my
counseling and some of the things that i
dealt with so
i don't want to blame like it's the
women you know what i mean so what
happens is there's this weird circle
that takes place
where now the husband has seen that and
now he's going to back up because he
doesn't want to lose his family he
doesn't want the
woman to you know to do that right so
now he's what he might do is he might
hide it
next time okay so now hiding it
might be the woman's gonna find out the
same type of behavior is gonna happen
anyway so it's still gonna lead to
wreckage
right so if people would just say hey
this is
the rule of allah i know it's not easy
we're not going to pretend for a second
as men
that we understand how difficult it is
for women because they are jealous
and the wives of the prophet saws were
the best women the best wives
and they were jealous you know and there
was issues between them
and there was comp uh you know
competition and sometimes
there was arguments no doubt but this
dunya is not meant to be jannah
and that's why these events teach us on
how to deal with these things
and these things will happen and it's
okay you live through it
and you move on right but
people you know instead of submitting
instead of
knowing that hey look one way or the
other is gonna happen either he's gonna
tell me or not it's gonna happen
if sadly subhanallah a lot of men who
cannot
and will not they will go towards the
haram
they will have issues they will either
be
you know either committing zinna or
going you know being being addicted to
pornography
i mean i'm dealing with cases where
people are just addicted to poor
they're married they have children they
have but they cannot
it's just not there you know it's just
not enough that's a good point i had a
a guest imam isa was on the show uh you
guys can watch that we did this
episode on pornography and he was
directing he was
he was showing that one of the root
causes that he's seeing of people
actually having a crisis of faith
was actually the pornography so yeah
uh so tell me now tell me now that uh
the
the person you made a good example so
that you have already 50 almost 60
percent
of marriages just failing in general
and how is polygamy to blame
unless it's just being used as a
scapegoat now because
the the man wasn't even having multiple
families is just him and his wife and
they
already 50 60 percent as you said are
being destroyed and then you take it
back to just
marriage in these times in general how
how can you use that as a scapegoat
right it's it's not a it's not it's not
an excuse uh
marriages in general are suffering
people are suffering why
again because our gender roles are mixed
uh the understanding of what it means to
be husband and wife
are all up and down people are not
they're looking always for explanations
and guidance and other
than the divine and what allah has
revealed so
hence we have a problem you know houston
we have a big problem
right and people are not willing to
solve it and then they start blaming it
on
men and polygyny and their desires
and they know that they're sensual and
sexual then
you know all the words come out and all
the attacks come out
and it's not because the reality what we
call a walk yeah
in arabic and islam is that it's
otherwise just look around
people are failing at marriage why
they're failing a marriage
i've made i've talked and addressed this
also because
the divine revealed nature of men and
women is
mixed right now there's so much
propaganda from the media
and from these communities with the
letters and all that i'm not sure if you
guys can
mention i'll mention it straight out
usually in my shows
because i don't think there's anything
wrong with it but they are
pushing to destabilize the family system
and the marriages are failing and women
are
turning to women and men are turning to
men or being signaled
or doing whatever and you know it's
destruction
and people don't want to get married
anymore forget about it forget about it
they're not
becoming you know gay or lesbian
they are just not willing to get married
anymore they don't want to gamble
anymore they won't they didn't know that
it's going to lead into this
there's a half half chance that it's
going to be a disaster
you know right so how can people blame
pelogeny for the problems of marriages
and
in the world i would say polygyny is a
solution it removes a lot of the
pressure
on the woman on the men uh you know it
it strengthens the community if people
are only
willing to understand that it's not just
about the sensual part
it's not that's not the only objective
don't tell me
that abraham and and jacob and the
prophets
it was just because they're so essential
you know okay they were essential
of course what do you think they didn't
just you know sit and look at each other
no doubt they had children they
procreate it and this is
natural it's such a hypocritical you
know argument where people
bring up the issue of sex and sex but
the whole society is hyper-sexualized
and all of a sudden when it comes to
marriage and sex
oh he wants sex like
everywhere you look is sex illegal sex
well when a man wants to do the proper
way
oh he's so sexualized and he's such a
you know chauvinist
and and an animal and whatnot they start
coming up with all these terms that i've
even lost track of what kind of you know
labels and terms they come up with you
know so paddle up to
to to demean you know the the males
couple more questions i just want to get
in uh we're almost about to wrap up
someone uh says that why are you guys
talking about this you got
things going on in yemen you got all the
crises in the world
why are you talking about this topic now
have you heard this
argument yeah i've heard this i mean
that's a good point there's a lot of
problems
in the world i'll tell you why we're
talking about this because again
it's done and this is
done a lot of times in a in a wrong way
as i said
and because this affects directly the
family unit
which is the building block of the
community which is the building block of
society
which is the building block of the umma
so the umma
on the general level is suffering from
war why is it suffering
because at the building block level
we're having problems with the family
unit
so we're talking here about making sure
we fix
you know those new screws those details
before we can you know paint the car you
know you need to make sure that you
tighten all the screws and everything is
proper
before you look at painting the car no
doubt the wars in yemen in syria these
are
huge problems okay and i'm not saying
that polygyny
is gonna fix you know the war in yemen
what i'm saying is that
that if we can fix the way we look at
islam
because it's a weakness when men and
women do not accept
a ruling of allah it shows a weakness in
iman
it's a weakness in our community when
our families are not willing
are fighting each other are at each
other's throats
accusing you know debasing each other
insulting each other
because they're trying to follow sunnah
the prophet salallahu
and you say oh you're picky about the
sunnah why don't you follow this and
watch
this is a natural sunnah this is about
building the family
and the prophet saws said oh people
you know procreate have children
i will be proud of you on the day of
judgment how are you going to have many
children if you don't marry and you
don't procreate you know the process
said i will be proud of your number okay
so we're not saying that this is you
know that there's no bigger issues there
are bigger issues
this is just at that level of family
it's very natural it happens anyway me
and you
can educate people about it and we can
change
you know within our society this issue
but bottom line
is my personal problem with the people
is not just polygyny is the fact that
when someone tries to practice be it
polygyny
be growing your beard be it you know
woman covering her hijab or a man
protecting his wife and not you know
putting her and exposing her out there
it's an issue of how we take the rules
of allah that we are slowly
denying them because it doesn't fit us
we don't like it
and we forget that islam means
submission
and now we're slowly changing it to if i
like it
i will do it if i don't like it i will
find an excuse and make a whole
problem around it to make sure that no
one else does it as well
that's a good point so should a woman
who she's chosen
out of her own free will she's consented
to it she feels this is good for her
maybe she has a career maybe she doesn't
need someone to
maintain her she just wants a husband
she's chased all of the diplomas degrees
and she says look i just need a man in
my life
should she be bullied now by others say
oh you're going to be
you know second third or fourth and then
a man also just because now
he's stepping up he don't watch porn he
don't want to have a jump kick or
starter or a
late night whatever you call them
nowadays
uh he wants to extend his family
should he be bullied should he be looked
down upon like some of these uh
people who are doing zen a day at night
all over the place
no i don't have no doubt these people
should not be bullied but they are
bullied
that's the thing if any woman i remember
one of the sisters you know and that's a
story from her
she said that she went to the masjid and
she basically
um said this is the best place to find a
wife for my husband
this is a woman who's looking for a wife
for her husband
and she basically prays a lot with the
sisters
and then you know they're sitting after
salah so she said sisters you know
this is uh have a request anyone of you
is not married i would like to offer my
husband
and it became a fist fight she got
beaten up
in the masjid she was beaten up brutally
you know that the people had to go uh
from
they they had to go from the brothers
side upstairs because they had the
screams and the fight
to stop you're kidding me in the masjid
you're kidding me in the measure united
states of america
in the mississippi the one the ones who
say that these are our examples the
mothers of the believers
i mean this is like people we often say
they get
they got jealous but did they transgress
limits boundaries that allah
that's that's that's a shame man that's
horrible words kind of that's horrible
and this is not the story you know i
know about this
so you know i mean people don't just get
bullied right because look
if she wants to if she's doing that
sometimes a woman is going like this is
her prerogative
if you don't want to do it that's your
business but don't interfere
with someone else saying that this is
the right system for me
this is the correct thing for me
so so let's uh we'll conclude um just a
couple of things one
if you are someone who has a chance like
acon
to represent it to be proud of it create
awareness of it
what do you have to say for people in
the community people who have a voice i
mean just you know it's easy to be a
sycophant
you know and suck up to many of your
followers and people out there and
be apologetic but while other people are
just
in a hyper sexual society you know
they're doing all sorts of
debauchery and all sorts of sexual
deviants and whatnot
but now this is legislated from the
crate of heavens and earth so you should
be proud
of this and stand up even if you're not
doing it to you know support those who
are and educate the people and help
those sisters out there
who cannot find a husband what do you
have to say to
to them and then we'll close it up yeah
i think as i said
there's a lot of brothers a lot of imams
a lot of you know shaykhs and guys who
have a lot of followers
and these followers are having problems
they're having issues specifically with
regards to polygyny
and i think it's a responsibility on
them to educate them to
to raise the awareness don't be scared
if you're bored and have you know these
things and
you know oh it's easy for you to say no
i i've had
you know uh fire from from my board you
know when i started posting things
and i said you know what no problem move
forward what you gonna do you know i
mean
you know the risk is with allah we're
not saying anything
i mean that's the funny thing people
don't listen we are trying to
educate the people we're not saying
please repeat we're not saying
that we're empowering men to abuse women
we're empowering men to dump women we're
empowering men to be
you know pricks or bad people no we are
trying to say
community leaders imams guys let's teach
the ummah
how to do it let's teach the ummah that
this is
a solution to problems let's teach them
that there
are sisters who are going to go tonight
to sleep alone who wish they would have
a child
who are very good sisters and have the
right to a family
but they're being cut off from the
community because of what
because of what because of selfishness
because of pride and arrogance while
everyone else is running in the
background committing illegal pollution
and unlawful politician
come on you know i think more imams more
people have to start
educating not about making fun it's not
about making jokes
about this thing because people try to
joke about this it's not about jokes
it's not about fun it's not about
rubbing it in women's space
it's about raising awareness education
because the more people understand it
the more they see these respectful
you know imams and leaders that they
look up to talking about it
slowly that veil of ignorance
will be removed slowly they will start
saying
okay it's not so bad i think we can work
it out
i think we should give all those women
a chance to also have a husband
so let's uh let's finish it up uh we we
covered a lot a lot to uh
digest for a lot of people but if you're
sincere you talked about islam meaning
submission
submission to the creator not the
creation doing god's will
and when it was done you gave some
examples from the earlier prophets to
the last the final message of muhammad
peace and blessings be upon them
they came with a whole moral code a
whole system on top of that
you know uh built on the tohi the pure
monotheism and everything for life is
there
and he practiced it he did it and you
have his sahaba then you have science we
talked about the science we talked about
there's the coolidge effect people can
look that up
there's there's so much data out there
on this and then we talk about love a
lot of times we hear this word love and
let's end with this ayah
and you can comment on it where god
almighty in the quran allah the creator
of the heavens and earth the almighty
the majestic the supreme
he revealed the book it's the quran
tamper-free taber proof it's a living
miracle for anyone who's sincere looks
at it
and god almighty allah is saying in this
book
say if you love allah follow me
and allah will love you and forgive you
your sins because allah is the most
forgiving the most merciful
what do you think connecting this ayah
to everything because people say love
love love if you love
then what do you do you follow the
messenger
exactly you know love for a lot of
people is just lip service
even when it comes to marriage and
relationships right so allah puts here
test
okay you're really sincere about love
you really love
allah then follow the prophet sallallahu
alaihi
and you know we look at the life of the
prophet
be it polygamy be it that he was a real
man be it that he
handled conflict the way he did that he
wasn't shy away from you know
he wasn't afraid he was not a coward i
think we need
we i think the whole world needs
to look at this man's allah
and follow him i believe the world would
be a great earth place and best a better
place
and you want to demonstrate your love
for
god then of course it only makes sense
that you would
follow his last and final
messenger muhammad sallallahu alaihi in
all aspects of life
in all his life beautiful beautiful
because i thought about this
when the sister went into the masjid and
she was like
implementing one of the other sunnahs
where if you love for your
brother or sister what you love for
yourself and she was trying to do that
she got beat down
if you're following this ayah there's no
way you're going to do something like
that so this is a general for everything
we do in our life
that we follow the way of the last front
of messenger if we like some things we
don't
but there is a code of conduct you know
how we need to behave how we need to
express
ourselves in a dignified way and a
dignified man we make mistakes and all
that but this should be our guiding
light we often see here the mantra quran
and sunnah
but many people now they all the deen
their emotions getting away and the deen
goes out the window
you can't do that that's the test you
know what i mean now you're being tested
are you really following do you really
love allah and his messenger
or when the test comes it's like you
know do it my way
have it your weight it's not burger king
you can't have it your way
yeah thank you thank you very much thank
you for uh spending some time with us
again it's always a pleasure jazakallahu
and people can go ahead and see that
whole series you actually want
more details they can watch it on your
youtube channel
yes michelle okay just put your name
thank you very much
gabriel el romani for being with us here
on the dean
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thank you for tuning in peace be with
you assalamu