Next time you get me.
My name is Brother Bon Muhammad. I'm uh
people know me I guess as a spoken word
poet, you know, slashperformance poet,
storyteller. Um I'm actually, you know,
of an Aromo descent. My ancestry is the
Oromo people in Ethiopia. We're actually
the largest ethnic group in all of East
Africa. A lot of people don't know that
about us, but uh I'm not Somali just in
case you're wondering because a lot of
people think that as well. And uh
alhamdulillah, my parents, you know,
left Ethiopia as political refugees.
They were escaping a civil war that was
taking place in the late '7s and uh they
migrated to Egypt and from Egypt they
went to Canada and so I was actually
born in Canada. So, alhamdulillah, I'm
Canadian uh African Muslim.
Alhamdulillah. But Islam is really the
focus of my life.
Can you tell us a little bit about
yourself before you basically started
practicing Islam? like where you're
coming from, your background, etc.
Yeah, the area that I grew up in in
Toronto wasn't um you know,
alhamdulillah, it wasn't a bad bad area,
but it wasn't an area by which, you
know, a lot of people had direction in
their lives. I grew up in an area that
was actually very diverse, one of the
most diverse areas in Toronto where I
had, you know, a lot of friends which
were um you know, Italians, Portuguese.
I went to a Jewish elementary school
populated area. A lot of my friends I
grew up down the road from actually
little Jamaica, the highest population
of Jamaicans outside of Jamaica. So that
was you know my influence was this you
know very multicultural diverse
background but unfortunately I didn't
grow up with a lot of Muslims even
though I was from a Muslim family there
wasn't a strong Muslim influence and um
for me it was very easy to identify with
you know other groups because you know
when you come into these places you know
even though I'm I'm Oro from Ethiopia to
them I was just black that's all it
meant so being black meant that you know
I had to be like the blacks that I knew
which were the Jamaicans and the West
Indians and you know people of that
background who you know unfortunately
were not Muslim and so they really
shaped my understanding of life and so I
grew up you know very confused like a
lot of these youth we see nowadays very
confused as to my identity you know was
I African was I black was I Muslim was I
this was I that was I Canadian was I you
know and so I think like many youth I
really found my identity you know
shifted from like dayto-day you know
this day I was with these people and
then when I played soccer, I was with my
Italian friends and then when I went to
parties, I was with my white friends and
now I went, you know, down the road I
see all my Jamaican friends and and I
was alhamdulillah, my family did, you
know, I did go to Madrasa, I went, you
know, on the weekends and learned the
Quran. But just the weekends wasn't
enough. You know what I'm saying? The
weekend thing, it was wasn't really
working for me because I would be just
even more confused as to who I was. So
that eventually ended up, you know,
leading me astray and leading me to a
direction where, you know, I completely
just forgot about my Islam. I completely
forgot about everyone I was with and the
things that you know I really kind of
took as a religion was like hip-hop you
know hip-hop became like a religion for
me and this is a very sad and scary
thing to say that it is a dean of a lot
of people you know and people say and if
you're familiar with the hip-hop
lifestyle you know that hip-hop it you
know it's more than a music it's more
than just music it's a culture you know
it shapes the way you dress it shapes
the people you hang out with it shapes
your language it shapes your culture so
in many ways it becomes like a dean it
becomes like a religion and So this was
the earliest sense of religion that I
had was the street culture, hip-hop, you
know what I'm saying? Break dancing,
graffiti, MCing, all that kind of stuff.
That was really, you know, my
introduction to life. And that's uh, you
know, how I lived my life for quite a
while. Subhan Allah. Alhamdulillah, my
parents were always big on education. So
one thing that, you know, I never took
for granted was the fact that even
though I was in the streets and I was
mingling with, you know, people that I
shouldn't have been with, I still stayed
in school. Alhamdulillah, I finished my
high school at the top of my grade. Um,
I actually was the validictorian of my
graduating class. So, I was the one who
gave, you know, the the commencement
speech on behalf of the the graduating
class. And people knew me as a joke.
People knew me as somebody who, you
know, was fun and I was loud and I like
to, you know, like to be on the stage.
At that point, I was doing a lot of
theater. And, uh, I just kind of just
barely got into writing and I started,
you know, performing my raps and the
things that I was, you know, accustomed
to at that time.
I
have a theory.
I think that IF WE JUST TAUGHT kids how
to be themselves, THEN WE WOULD HAVE NO
need for a therapist or prison cells.
Because you see, in school, I was the
token black guy. And to fit in, ooh, I
WOULD DO WHATEVER IT TAKES. BUT BLACK
HISTORY MONTH WAS THE ONLY TIME THAT I
COULD GET A DATE. [laughter]
You see,
we have a tendency to fear what we do
not know. Because sometimes the scariest
thing that you can ever hear in life is
no. No, you are not popular and no you
are not cool AND NO YOU WILL NOT BECOME
ANYTHING EVEN IF YOU finish school. You
know, it was wasn't until, you know,
there was subhan Allah, I remember in in
high school particularly at the end of
my high school years, there was one
brother and one Somali brother,
mashallah, who was on dean and this was
very strange for us because, you know, a
lot of us even though my last name was
Muhammad, you know, people didn't really
think of me as a Muslim. And remember
this was like right after 9/11. So I was
living, you know, this was like 2001,
2002 was when I was like in my high
school days. So I remember at that time
you know people would start saying
things like you know oh these Muslims
are like this and like that and me not
knowing anything really about my own
religion I kind of just remained quiet
you know because I didn't want to be you
know I didn't want to be made fun of I
don't want people to start you know
making fun of me and insulting me so I
just became one of those you know from
Muhammads to Mo you know I just really
became a mo I became quiet and I really
felt you know that sadness in my heart
like even now to this day when I look
back cuz I remember there was that
brother this one brother mashallah who
you know would try and gather rather the
the few Muslims there were in our school
he tried to set up a like a Juma prayer
and uh you know many of us didn't really
take it serious and unfortunately
you know I I really kind of I found it
hard to I felt like at some points I was
too busy trying to impress my non-Muslim
friends to you know embrace this Muslim
brother who was trying to give me da was
trying to you know kind of call me back
to what was true and it became you know
even harder for me as I graduated from
high school and I went to university
because in university obviously you're
met with so many different cultures and
lifestyles and people really at that age
feel like they're free you know this is
the age when you a lot of people leave
their parents house they go live on
campus a lot of people start you know
going to parties and start doing things
that they wouldn't have normally have
done and in that age you know like
subhan allah like a lot of kids you know
I felt even more lost when you start
mixing in with the party cine and you
start you know I mean brothers know what
happens when you you know see girls on
the road and sisters start getting
picked up by guys and and it was you
know big fitness for me. Subhan Allah.
And uh I really found myself caught up
in a lot of bad relationships. And I
made a lot of bad friends who
unfortunately, you know, were
part of my dean that I had, you know,
developed at that time, the religion
that I was following, which was like
this hip-hop lifestyle, street culture
kind of urban thing, which
unfortunately, you know, didn't really
do much for me in the in the long run
because a lot of those brothers and
sisters, you know, they didn't really
have my back in the end. And there's a
lot of things that I went through that
really helped me, you know, showed me
the light. These people weren't my real
friends. And uh you know that was kind
of that.
Was there a stage in your life that you
started to feel to yourself that you
know what I'm a Muslim this this
lifestyle that I'm living is not
correct. Did you ever start to feel like
that?
Mhm. Yeah. You know what as I was
growing up and uh again I was talking
about you know what was happening in in
the you know Canada US post 911 where a
lot of people started attacking Islam
and these attacks were so bling. I
remember being in high school and you
know there was a law class I was taking
and there was a debate and people were
talking about you know whether women
should be you know whether women should
be taking off hijabs and and and
passport pictures and I remember you
know getting really heated with people
and at that time I really I knew in my
heart that Islam was the truth. I knew
in my heart that this there was only one
God and that you know this was the
correct path and I wanted to you know
speak up about Islam. So I secretly, you
know, I started learning and researching
on my own. And even though I wasn't
confident enough to come out and start,
you know, uh, battling people or telling
people off like I just needed to to
learn enough that I could be basically
in a private conversation explain to
somebody that look this is actually not
what Islam says. You know, Islam is like
this, Islam is like that. And I remember
I'll tell you one story that really I
remember was a big change point in my
life because even though at that point
in my life I started identifying more as
a Muslim post 911 if your last name was
Muhammad Kalas you were Muslim it didn't
even matter if you're practicing you
weren't practicing right but I remember
one time subhan Allah I was with some
guys there were some some guys that I
used to hang out with and um you know at
that time you know I'm ashamed to say
but like I used to you know I used to
indulge in certain activities you know
whether it be partying you know the type
of lifestyle that comes with partying
the type of things people do
extracurricular stuff people do. And I
remember I was, you know, doing this
particular thing and a and uh, you know,
a guy asked me, he's like, you know,
Muhammad, yeah, you're a Muslim. And I
was like, yeah, yeah, I'm a Muslim. And
he's like, but Muslims don't do this.
And he started telling me, Muslims don't
act like this. And I said to myself,
well, you know, I didn't I was just
embarrassed. Subhan Allah. I was really
embarrassed for a non-Muslim to tell me
that, you know, I shouldn't be partying
and I shouldn't be out and I shouldn't
be doing this. It really was a blow to
my ego because you know I felt like even
this person knew that Islam did not
condone my behavior. So you know if this
was correct then what type of person was
I and a lot of times when the truth
comes our way you know as Muslims
sometimes we take offense to it when
somebody might give you advice or
somebody might say to you you know
brother you know fear Allah brother
sister you know you shouldn't be doing
this sometimes our own nuffs our own
egos will take the best of us and we'll
not take that advice sincerely and
instead we'll just take it as a personal
attack and I felt like the Muslims that
I knew that were around me were just
like that you know they were Muslims
that would attack you and I remember I
hated going to the masid because the
masid that I went to that them times I
used to braid my hair and them times I
used to have long hair. I know you you
don't probably don't believe it now but
that time I used to have long long long
hair and I used to braid my hair and I
used to come to the masid like for Jama
or you know for Eid and stuff like that
and the way the uncles used to stare at
me the way everybody used to look at me
like you know look at this brother why
does he look like that he looks like a
calf for the and I say yo b you guys I
don't want to come in this building and
I'm saying I don't want to be around
people who are going to treat me and
look at me a certain way and they're not
going to you know give me the respect as
a Muslim and so that was enough
incentive for me to stay away from the
massagid to stay away from the house of
Allah And this is the type of da people
were given back then and you still see
it to this day. You know, you might see
a sister walking the masid without a
hijab and you say, "Oh, sister, what is
she doing in here? How can she come in
here looking like that?" And you think
to yourself, "Subhan Allah, is the masid
not the place for the sick people to go
to? Is the masid not the place? Is is,
you know, are these not the people whose
hearts are away from Allah and that they
should be getting closer to him?" And
so, you know, I really I identified as a
Muslim, but I hated Muslims. I loved
Islam, but I I really was not fond of
the Muslims themselves. And
alhamdulillah, you know, I really took
the time out on my own to try and learn
Islam, you know, free of cultural
interpretations, free of people's own,
you know, understandings and misinterp
misinterpretations of the dean. And I
tried my best to, you know, actually
read the Quran. A lot of us, you know,
in our lifetime, I think very few people
have actually read the entire Quran.
Even in your own language, in English,
from front to back, very few people have
actually read the entire book. And so I
took it upon myself, you know, one year
that I said to myself, you know what in
this Ramadan, it was in the month of
Ramadan, it was the beginning of
Ramadan. And I I really said to myself,
you know what, once one year, I'm going
to actually, you know, learn to pray.
Cuz I mean, first of all, I didn't know
how to pray. As a Muslim, you'd be going
to the masid, you know, you'd be going
for a salah and then you say Allahbar
and you go down just feel like you're
just a robot. You don't really know what
you're doing. And so I really had this
connection that was lost. Subhan Allah.
You know this was one thing in my life
that was missing and and you know a
person who prayed and then hasn't prayed
will know this feeling you know because
the salah becomes something which is
like you know your heartbeat and imagine
I just I felt that need to get closer to
Allah. I didn't know how I didn't even
know where to begin. I didn't know which
books to read. I didn't and and it was
really sad too. I know I'm rambling, but
you know, the brothers that I knew to be
practicing, the people that I knew to be
like good Muslims, to me, they were just
nerds. Like, I couldn't, you know what
I'm saying? I couldn't really sit with
them. I couldn't, they didn't look like
me. They didn't talk like me. They
didn't understand where I was coming
from. They didn't see the lifestyle that
I lived before to understand the
struggles that I was going through. Even
for someone like me to pray or to fast,
it was a big deal, you know, to drop
everything you were doing. And that's
why I said like I felt like a revert
because I really was coming from a very
very far distance from the dean. And the
people around me were not very
supportive. And it had a lot to do with
my friends because the people, I mean,
my non-Muslim friends, they couldn't
care less. They thought I was strange
that I, you know, didn't want to smoke
or I didn't want to drink or anything.
They thought I was there something wrong
with me. And then the Muslim people that
I was trying to connect with, you know,
they thought I was, you know, I looked
strange because I had braids in my hair
and they thought that, you know, my
pants were a certain level and my my
pants were too saggy. So, they couldn't
really check me either. And it just
became a big fitness for me. But, you
know, alhamdulillah, slowly and surely,
I started coming closer in my own way.
you know, one year in the month of
Ramadan, I I really try to commit myself
to, you know, making this Ramadan the
best one possible. And for me, that
really involved, you know, first of all,
learning how to pray because I didn't
know how to pray correctly. And, uh, you
know, it's a shame, too, because you're
a Muslim your whole life, but you don't
know the basics. There's a lot of things
that I didn't know. I didn't know how to
pray. I didn't really know how to fast.
I didn't really know, you know, the
basic fundamental pillars of Islam. So,
that year, I remember one of my cousins,
he sent around a video just like for
people that, you know, he thought might
need it. And it was just like a guide to
pray. So I said, "Okay, alhamdulillah,
let me watch this video." I remember
studying it like it was an exam, you
know. Okay. He goes up, he says Allah
and just knowing these things and from
my childhood, but just trying to refresh
my memory. So, alhamdulillah, you know,
I I tried my best in that month to fast
and you know, an actual fast, a fast
which was not just a restraining from
food, but it was restraining from, you
know, from idol talk. It was restraining
from looking at things I shouldn't be
looking at. you know just training from
you know you know doing all the things
which you shouldn't be doing and I
remember that month you know I had an
iPod I gave it away you know you have a
girlfriend you dump your girlfriend you
know this is the month where mashallah
you're going hard you know what I'm
saying you trying to put everything
aside for the sake of Allahh and that
month you know really did a lot for my
life because I remember that's the month
when I really established my salah and I
you know alhamdulillah I don't think to
that from that day till now I've ever
missed a salah so that was like a big
you know a big big positive for me and
it really helped impact my life and at
after that point, you know, it became so
much easier. Subhan Allah. They always
say that the signs of an accepted
Ramadan is when you continue the things
you were doing in the month of Ramadan.
And for me, it was, you know, a huge
changing point in my life. And I almost
felt like [snorts] this huge burden had
been lifted off my shoulders because at
that point, I remember I wasn't I was
living on my own. I wasn't living with
my parents. I was, you know, I was just
really really frustrated and my heart
just felt really really sick. And I
remember after that month, subhan Allah,
during that month, just feeling this
sense of relief, slowly feeling as
though the pressure was releasing and
slowly feeling as though I had purpose
and direction in my life and getting an
idea of, you know, who I was and what I
wanted to be and really putting away all
the people around me, you know, not
caring for what people said. My own
friends started, you know, basically,
you know, they started making fun of me
or they started telling me that what I
was doing was weird. And mind you, they
were non-Muslims, so they didn't really
understand anyways. And for me it was
important that you know what forget
them, forget you. I have Allahhana and
allahel is the only one that in my life
really mattered. And for me that was a
big turning point in my life because you
know that month of Ramadan particularly
was a time when I decided to change my
my life around. And you know to this day
alhamdulillah it's you know been
similarly put on the same path.
But this world is full of signs from the
moon to the stars and the sky from the
bees and the bugs like a seed in your
blood. Like a fiend or a drug makes you
need to look up and QUESTION WHAT'S UP.
WHY YOU DEAL WITH THIS STUFF WHEN YOUR
SPIRITS ARE CRUSHED AND YOU TREK THROUGH
the rough but like thunder it struck.
Said be and it was. All the signs that
were sent, they finally make sense. You
feel the torment, so you need to repent.
WHEN YOUR HEART IS CEMENT, it's hard as
a brick. CUZ YOUR SOUL IS WORTH MORE
than the dollars and cents. All the
money in the world couldn't buy you
happiness cuz verily it is in the
remembrance of Allah that hearts do find
rest.
What is it like now practicing the dean?
Are you better now or were you better
off before? People don't realize, but
Islam in itself is not meant to be, you
know, just a set of boring rules that
you follow and it's just this tradition
and you wear this thing and you do this
and you go like that and no, Islam is
actually a it's guiding principles to
help shape a person's life. And it's not
like the rules we know of in our
everyday society in Western world that
were just made by men and today they
like them, tomorrow they don't like
them, so they change them. No, Islam was
designed by the one who designed
everything, right? The creator of all
created Islam as a perfect methodology
for living your life. So wall this deen
for me has been just that you know and I
always say this statement people don't
understand me but I'm not a religious
person. I'm very rational in my thinking
and for me Islam is the rational choice
because you understand you know that
okay you know we shouldn't drink uh
alcohol because AB and C we shouldn't
eat pork because ABC you know we
shouldn't be doing this because of that
and every rule alhamdulillah we can come
up with rule we can come up with reasons
why you shouldn't be doing it but the
real reason why we live the way we live
is because Allahh has asked us to that's
it that's what it comes down to you know
the little bit of knowledge that I have
now tells me that I should be accepting
and understanding the things that I
don't understand because I know that
this this this set of rules, this law,
this lifestyle that I have been given as
a choice is not for my burden. It's not
to make my life miserable, but instead
it's to help me in so many ways. And
that's exactly what it's done. You know,
I have clear focus and understanding.
And you just think the problems that you
had yesterday, if you look at them
through your Islamic eyes, right? you
look at them through the the I guess
metaphorically the eyes of the dean
everything becomes clear whether it's
you know poverty whether it's suffering
whether it's pain whether it's joy
whether it's happiness whether it's
marriage whether it's divorce whether
it's death whether it's life all these
things have a perfect understanding you
know I know the reason why I'm living
the way I'm living I know the reason why
I'm doing what I'm doing and what I'm
not doing what I'm not doing right this
religion for me is more than just you
know a set of rules it's a lifestyle
choice that has been given to to me by
the one who knows what's best for me.
You know, just like as a parent, you
would look after your children. You
would tell your child, you know what,
you got to drink your milk. And your
child might not understand. The child
might say, I don't know why I have to
drink milk. I don't know why I have to
read. I don't know why I have to go to
school. We are that child sometimes
because we as Muslims are just as human
beings sometimes we don't understand,
you know, why these things are put in
place. But Islam for me has just really
given me a purpose and an understanding
of why I've been put on this earth. And
there's nothing more beautiful than, you
know, a clear mission statement.
Everything, you know, can get people's
lives can get very blurry and you can
sometimes forget, you know, the reason
why you're being tested or the reason
why you've been given this wealth or the
reason why, you know, you haven't been
given this spouse or whatever it may be.
But as Muslims, alhamdulillah, we say in
the bad, we say alhamdulillah. In the
good, we say alhamdulillah. Everything
is alhamdulillah because Allahh is the
one who loves us more than we love
ourselves. More than our parents love
us, more than our mother loves us,
Allahhanaa loves us. Any trial I've gone
through in my life now as a practicing
Muslim, it makes sense. You know, any
good that's come to me as a practicing
Muslim makes sense. I know how to do it.
I know how to deal with it. And this was
not what my life was like before. Things
would happen to you and you just you'd
lose your mind. You know, things would
happen that would be bad and you would
not know how to take it. Things would
happen that would be good and you would
just think so good of yourself and it's
just extremes. You know, Islam is the
middle. Islam tells you to understand
that look you know if something good
happens to you then you should thank
Allahh and you should have you know you
should basically take that shuk and you
should act upon it and if something bad
happens to you you should say you know
alhamdulillah you should turn back to
Allah you should have with what Allah
had patience with Allahh has given you
so this to me was like the the polar
opposite to what I knew from before and
it really you know I I can't stress that
fact enough it gave me direction and it
gave me a purpose to my life which you
know I didn't really have before
back in the A they say that I came from
slaves
as though being a slave is something
that would make me ashamed.
Touche, homie.
You would actually be amazed to know
that we are all slaves.
But in what kind of way?
I mean, some people submit to
cigarettes, smoking five times a day,
and some people worship money only to
see it go away.
A couple people put their faith in
whatever the weatherman say. And some
people even pray to the sun. But I
wonder who created the sun. Anyways,
you know, the prophetam he taught us
that you were on the religion of your
friends. you know, you were on this
lifestyle of your friends. And I think
that this advice, you know, the
prophetam gave us is so pertinent in our
times because many of us choose our
friends like we choose, you know,
basically cereal at the grocery store
with really not much choice, just
whatever looks appealing at the time.
But imagine that, you know, the person
who wants to get married, you know, when
you're looking for the right wife or
husband, you know, you're going to start
inquiring about this person's
background. You want to know about their
family, you want to know about their
religion, you want to know about their
wealth, you want to know about
everything about them. and this the
person who you know you're going to be
spending the rest of your life with.
When we're looking for friends, you
know, we don't really care. You know,
I've known this guy since I was two.
I've known this person since I was 10 or
this person's known me since then. And
so that becomes a reason why you're
friends with this person. But, you know,
to be honest, I think that we have to
start choosing our friends like we
choose our spouses. You know, your
friend should be of topnotch quality.
Your friend should be A or A+es only.
You know, because if you're with
somebody who is not going to make you a
better person, then that person
unfortunately is not a friend that you
should be taking. We need to learn to
have friends who don't want to just be
friends in this dunya, but they want to
be your next door neighbors in Jenna.
How many friends do you have like that?
Friends that going to remind you,
brother, sister, fear Allah. Brother,
sister, let's establish the salah. How
many friends are you going to have that
are going to tell you, brother and
sister, that what you're doing is wrong.
I don't think that's a good action. You
know, unfortunately, many of our friends
have just become people that we know.
And when I started practicing, and I I I
don't want it to sound like, you know,
an arrogant thing or whatever, but I had
to cut a lot of people off. And you
really have to sometimes, you know, you
got to figure out what is your priority.
Why are you on this earth? And what are
you doing? And how long are you going to
be here for that you can have time to
mess around with people who don't have
your same agenda and priority in mind?
And so brothers and sisters, my advice
to you is to pick your friends wisely.
And make sure the people you're
surrounding yourselves are people who
are going to remind you of Allah subhana
wa ta'ala in good times and in bad. And
ultimately, you know, these people who
you're with are going to shape your
identity. And if there's some brother,
some brother or sister who you think is
not really doing that well, then you
know it's okay. Inshallah, be that
support system for them. But don't allow
your core group, don't allow the
majority of your friends to be people
who you constantly have to give dawa to.
No, be amongst the people who will give
dawa to you as well. Inshallah and you
can grow as people. So brothers and
sisters, inshallah, I hope that this
advice, you know, sincerely it works and
it penetrates your hearts and you know,
inshallah you will be my friend in this
world and you will benefit me. I will be
your friend in this world. Inshallah, we
will be the best of friends in the
hereafter. In Jenna for those inshallah,
I'd like to give a big and a big thank
you and shout out to Roadside to Islam
for all the amazing work they're doing.
And may Allah subh make this act heavy
on all of our skills and good deeds.
Inshallah, this is your brother Bon
Muhammad signing off.